Judge — March 14, 1896 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

172 A DANGER FORESEEN. . sTAKE time by the forelock, my boy.” “And be cut down by that scythe? Nit!” IT WAS LOANED. Thredd Bayer —" Wow's dat town down de railroad? Enny chance ter beg me dinner dere?” Ragson Tatters (disgusted) —"Naw! I struck nine houses fer me breakfust, an’ all de wo- men sed dey didn’t have nothin’ ‘cause it wuz Lent.” Thredd Bayer (disconso- lately) —" W'y, dat’s wot dey = told me in de udder town. I SSS | Se SS >= wonder who borrers all dat THE ADVANTAGE OF BIG FEET WHEN ONE WEARS WOODEN SHOES, grub?” SOME EXCUSE FOR HIM, Se THAT Dudely is a regu- lar spoon.” “Well, I don't blame him much. His young lady has a real peaches-and-cream complexion.” WOULD GET EVEN. Physician—* Mr, Loan- stien, I find that your little son Ikey has suffered a com- pound fracture of the arm.” Loanstien (to his wife)— * Leah, go oud und mindt de pawn-shop, und der nexd fel- ler vot vants to pawn any- ding charge him compoundt interesd. Ve musd ged efen on dot fracture some vay.” HIS PRESCRIPTION. + eTHE trouble with you.” said Dr. Paresis, after an examination of his patient, MARINE NOTES. COULDN'T AFFORD THEM. “is lack of exercise, What : ee “A bark lost in the sound.” Mu (meeting old acquaintance)—'*An’ how many _ is your occupation? kids hov yez had since yez got married, Casey?” Cee es eee Fes Oe oo on aure “Lam a letter-carrier, I cover a route cight miles long twice a day.” bélwearier aakiens; Ie lakes iverpiblog’O1 bia’ eaea'v diss “Well, you'll have to stop that. Give up your position and attend an Episcopal th’ childers.” church once a day.” THIS WAS A REAL ONE. #4] DO not like the expression ‘a quiet wedding,’ Mr. Scripps.” said. the editor to his new reporter.“ You know that in society there are no noisy weddings.” “But this was a quieter wedding than usual,” replied the reporter. “In what way?” “The parties were deaf- mutes and they were married by the use of the sign-language.” TOO LATE. Mr. Woodbie Passenger (in railroad-station at Poughkeep- sie)—" Here, you! What time does the next train go to New ' ais AN UNPARDONABLE APPROPRIATION, Mike—" Be jabers} 'tis jist oo ne iS McManus (severely)—"" Well, bad loock t' yez fer a kliptomanyack! Whin me woife Illen cashts an oidintifoyin’ oye gone, sor. an thim losht bloomers av hers yez billy-goat frinds ‘ll be oonable t’ ricognoize yez remains at th’ morgy.” comicbooks.com