Judge, 1896-01-18 · page 5 of 16
Judge — January 18, 1896 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple unrelated satirical cartoons and jokes typical of Judge's format: **"Guess Their Nationality"** mocks German-American immigrants through heavy accent dialect ("oud," "vill," "poy"). A mother punishes her child in a closet; he bribes his way out with money—the joke being stereotypical assumptions about German thriftiness. **"Alibi Proven"** presents a Black defendant charged with stealing a rooster. His wife corroborates his alibi—he was fighting with her instead. The humor trades on racist stereotypes of domestic violence and dialect. **"The Circus-Rider and the Mistaken Bronco"** shows humorous acrobatic mishaps, captioned with circus performer commentary. **"A Tragic Return"** is a domestic drama sketch: a husband discovers a man's hat and coat in his wife's room, but she explains they belong to her "cycling suit"—a joke about the then-controversial women's bicycle and its practical clothing. **"Brand New"** jokes about a "new woman" (modern, independent female) whose cosmetics rub off when kissing a child. The page reflects early 20th-century attitudes toward immigrants, race, women's independence, and changing social norms.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
GUESS THEIR NATIONALITY. 66 C)H, MA! please let me oud ob dis closet und I vill pe von goot poy.” “No, mine son ; you vas von pad poy und did not mind your ma, und you can- not come oud.” "Please, ma!” “No, mine child!” (After a few moments’ silence.) “Ma!” : "Vell, wat is it?” “If you vill let me oud I vill give you two dollars oud of mine pank to buy dot pin pa vould not give you de money for dis morning.” “Vell, now you vas a t'ortful poy to vant to puy your ma dot pin, und I could not bunish you after dot ; but vait till run und get de pank.” (<4 | 3h! horses he don’t know.—— <2 ALIBI PROVEN AND INDICTMENT DEFECTIVE. Jupce—" You are charged with breaking and entering the chicken-coop of "Squire Hennery upon the night of the fifth instant, between the hours of nine and ten, and abstract- ing therefrom a full-blooded Shanghai rooster. plead to this indictment ?” Sam Jounson —"* Not guilty, judge, an’ I kin prove an alibi; between de hours ob nine an’ ten dat night I wuz habin’ a fight wif mah wife.” Mus. JOHNSON (from the spectators’ seats)—"* Dat's so, le Lawd’s own trufe. He wantid de rooster biled im briled ; en’ ‘sides, ‘twant a Shanghai et all— but a ordinary buff Cochin,” How do you Sudge THE CIRCUS-RIDER AND THE MISTAKEN BRONCO. ee SUDDEN-DEATH (the /dako earthquake) —"*T'll teach this tenderfoot not to fool with —How do you like my fish jump for a starter ?— —vwill fetch you. — ope A TRAGIC RETURN. HE ENTERED the house soft- ly and mounted the dimly-lighted stair- way three steps at abound. Enforced absence had'caused their first separa- tion, and he imag- ined the surprised delight with which she would greet his unexpected return. But having reached her boudoir he paused, distracted and irresolute. ‘The room wore a familiar aspect. The fire flickered from the grate with a subdued gleam and a shaded lamp near the piano lent an air of elegance and grace to every article of furniture within its radius. ‘The apartment was unoccupied, but across the back of achair in.an alcove lay a man's hat and coat. Then suddenly there flashed upon him the recollection of having stumbled over a bicycle as he entered the gar- den gate. As he stood staring in dismay a portiére was drawn back at the opposite end of the room and revealed the figure of his wife. ‘“ Madam,” said he, pointing to the alcove as one fascinated, “ what is this —There yet ?— ——I see I must —Then maybe the saddle trick— —alling act — —If he's on to my roll Tm lost." At sight of him she turned pale and trembled. “Don't look so dreadful, Will,” she gasped. “I didn’t think you would mind. It is part of my cycling suit.” BRAND NEW. I won't wear them if you don’t want me to, Freddy Wyze—" Say, pa; Aunt Phyllis is a new woman, isn’t she?” Mr. Wyze— Why do you ask me that, Freddy ?” Freddy Wyze—"'Cause when she kissed me some of.the varnish rubbed off her cheek on my coat.”