Judge — November 5, 1892 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A NEW METHOD, “Gosh! I don't know how I can pay my hotel bill.” ¥—"* Did you call, sah?” JUDGE FALL PROVERBS. N ECHO is the foot-ball of sound. Oratory is like cheese; it is apt to get too full of life. A baby ought to know when to cry, and it generally does. The most beautiful woman that ever lived died in her babyhood. The country girl now prepareth to swoop down on the metropolis. Snoring is said to indicate sound health. Hearers of snoring de- mur on the sound, Even men possessed of plenty of natural front teeth are not always able to keep a stiff upper lip. Men are often dragooned into making daring promises under the soothing influences of a good dinner. District attorneys who convict the innocent merely in order to get a political pull will get it inthe neck on the day of judgment. Do not despise the linen duster because it is no longer en regle. Remember it may be on some one else next summer if you lose the ticket. “IN A GUILT FRAME.” Men largely occupy themselves in interchanging contempt for each other. The merchant sarcastically belittles the literary man and vice versa. So very German seemeth they— It would not much astonish me If now, snatched from obscurity, Demand a foaming stein of beer. NOTHING FURTHER. ERBERT had recently awakened to the fact of his increasing bigness, but what availed it, since he had a sister who was bigger? "By the way Clara*bosses me around,” he said, soothing his battered dignity in the pres- ence of a sympathetic friend, “you would actually think, if you didn’t know, that I was the drunken man and she was the policeman.” A DEMAND FOR THEM. +©NO." SAID the principal storekeeper in a southern town to a farmer who had brought some eggs for sale, “ no, I'm not buyin’ any fresh eggs to-day, but I'll take all the very stale ones you can bring in.” “How's that?” asked. the astonished farmer. “Well, you see, General Weaver is booked to speak here to-night.” ‘ell the proprietor ‘I'm very ill—think It succeeds, The dolls with which Queen Vic did play— ‘They should, in accents quaint and queer, “Yer see, cops, I'll tell yer how it was,” (ete.) No one will get to heaven any sooner by following an asthmatic drum through the streets and howling, “The Lamb, the Lamb, the bleeding Lamb.” It is believed by some people that David B. Hill will ere long be singing “Go to sleep, my baby,” in his new residence, “ Hunnah villa,” on the upper Hudson. Name all of the triumphs of art that you can— Of the triumphs attained by the genius of man; Of wer and of commerce, religion, the pre Of cunning inventions that hands may toil less ; hut leave out the maiden whose heart you enthrall And you leave out the greatest achievement of all, LEON MEAD. ACCOMMODATING. “Oh, Miss Lily ! why does yo" hab dem rings on yo’ belt, hu?" Miss Lity—'* Well, yo’ see, many ob de gemmen cain't git dey arm roun’ me when dey waltz, so dey grabs dem.” “* Wasn't that a good joke? Let's take a drink.” comicbooks.com