Judge — 1891 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE'S ANNUAL. THE WISH-BONE. HEY were dining—-he and she, Chattering incessantly — When the waiter, old and tried, ¥ Brought them chicken nictly fried, "* Grand it was to see her wade ‘Through her portion with white teeth 5 ‘Teeth that cut it like a blade, To the wish bone underneath. ‘Then, when it was free of meat, She in accents soft and sweet red, ‘* Make a wish with me.” Whis| 7 Certalnly 1 will,” said he. Both a moment silent thought, ‘Then he on the wish-bone caught Now the tug of war began “Tween the damsel and the man, ‘Till at last it snapped in twain— She had won it, that was plain. ‘ell me what you wished,” said she. That you might my darling be Thro’ all sorrow, strife and care— My existence you might share. . Was your wish like that at all ?” ‘No ;*‘she answered, ‘* you might call Mine a vain one, It was this That I yet may know the bliss Of a satin pearl-trimmed dress Unexcelled in loveliness.” Happy are these wishers two, What each wanted has come true He has won the damsel fair, She the gorgeous gown doth wear. A moral has this tale my friend, ‘That he who gets the shortest end May also get at last what he Has wished for most tremendously, LEON MEAD, A NEGLECTED FEATURE. O'ReAGAN—" It’s a ginuine meerscham Oi got {'r me birt‘day.” CONLAN (who prefers a short one)—"* Sure, yure nose must feel lonesome wid it.” BREAKUP AS AN ACTOR. Matilda Breakup is studying for the stage, but as she wishes to surprise her many friends by suddenly dashing out on the theatrical horizon as a dramatic star, she keeps very shady about it. She has had a new play written expressly for her by a New York reporter—the only one in the whole profession who is guilty of writing a play. The play is intensely tragic. The Duke of something or other loves the Countess of somewhere or another, and failing to secure her love, he murders the lady and hands in the checks himself. This is the grand scene of the play, but having no one to rehearse with, Matilda asked her father to read the character of the Duke, and give her the cues. Breakup is not au fait at acting. He can perform the act of emptying a schooner in a manner to bring down the house, but as an actor he is not worth a cent. However, he brushed up a bit, and one evening last week—one of those warm nights when the fire was uncomfortable, and it was necessary to slightly raise the win- dows,—Breakup and his daughter Matilda started in, making the front parlor the stage. Old Mrs. Blifkins, who lives a few doors down the street, SIMPLY TO EVEN THINGS. Count Peccaponna—"* Your daughter vas fall more deebly in lof mit me der longer ve vos married. Mr. Dusuque— Count Peccapos an’ twendy-fife 2” That’s good.” —"' Vell, can’d you maig dot hundert tousan’ a hundert started out that particular evening to go to the grocery. Just as she was in front of Breakup's, she heard the old man exclaim, in a hoarse voice : “Thou hast but three moment's more of life. With this keen blade thy heart's blood will be poured out as a libation to the God of Love.” Then she heard Matilda, in a pleading voice cry out: “Cruel man; would you let out my young life’s blood ?” Without waiting to hear more, Mrs. Blifkins started across the street and imparted the cheerfui information to the neighbors that Breakup was about to murder his daughter. In just about the shaking of the narrative of a spring lamb, there was a crowd of persons in front of the Breakup mansion, listening to the tu- mult withio. “Let go your hold!” was heard in Matilda’s voice. slave! remove thy coward hand from my throat!" And then there came, in Breakup’s deepest bass : “Thy doom is sealed! Prepare for instant death!" The startled auditors were further rewarded by hearing a shrill scream from Matilda ! “Help! help! What, ho! Is there no friendly arm to inter- pose?” And there was another yell. “Some one ought to go for a policeman,” exclaimed young Daffytow. “The old man’s killing her ;" and as another ear- splitting scream resounded from the parlor, he ran to the corner, (Continued on page 17.) “Base PMs ra A DANGER HAPPILY AVERTED. __ Mrs. Hocuetmer—"' Vat a peautiful childt, Mrs. Cohn ! his popper as nefler vas ,, Mas. Con He het a pad fall lasd he’s nose vas goin’ ter pe straighdt for lif ‘Unt der imich ohf k, unt ve vos afrait for seferal days comicbooks.com