Judge — August 15, 1891 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PROHIBITION. GHE read books yellow with age, Like the roses pressed in their pages ; She conned books merry and sage And she merrily scoffed at the sages. Her teeth like milk-opals gleamed, Her curved lips scornfully smiling ; An innocent maiden she seemed “Now why do you study old books— Books musty and mouldy and yellow?" “Old poets are pleasant, ‘odd zooks," And Petrarch, pray match me his fellow! And then those dear monks of Lorraine” “Good heavens, child, not those!" ‘* Yes, I know them, ‘Their language decidedly plain, Yet many a wile could I show them.” “Awile! Yea, a dozen forsooth. T'll swear to that, Beauty ; but truly For you to read such ‘tis uncouth, Incongruous, wicked, unruly !" “T know it,” she laughed, and her looks Would set an old anchorite sighing ; ** But they said I must not read these books, So of course I should read were I dying.” CORA LINN DANIELS, A PROVERB OF WIDE APPLICATION. 66] NEVER thought of the application before,” said the professor as he wrestled with a section of spring chicken; “but it is true in regard to poultry that it is the good die young.” NO TIME TO LOSE. Mrs. Wickstagf—"\ thought you weren't going away until next week.” Mrs. Bingo—*\ didn’t expect to, but my husband told me yesterday that he had a boil coming.” NO IDLE SUPERNUMERARIES. Were her eyes not so strangely beguiling. OFTEN THE WAY. ‘+]JOW about your great novel, Bagby?" asked his old friend, “I suppose it is in its tenth edition by this time.” « “No,” said Bagby sadly; “it hasn't gone into its first yet.” WORKS BOTH WAYS. BURGLAR-ALARM is a thing that pays; But then, you know, it will work both ways. Of course it may give a warning to you, But then it alarms the burglar too, AN APOLOGY FOR AN APOLOGY WANTED. Papa—" My daughter Minnie here tells me, sir, that you kissed her forcibly last night. Do you apologize?” Harry—"Yes. I'm sure nobody regrets the occurrence more than I.” i —"Sir!” Papa Minnie A GOOD ELEVATOR. Wickstaf{ (on step-ladder, trying to hang picture) —" This dictionary isn’t enough. Isn’t there anything else you can give me to put on top of this ladder?” Mrs. Wickstaf —" No; there isn’t a thing.” Wickstaf’ (brightly) —“ Oh, yes, there is. Hand me the gas-bill.” up: PITYING THE HEATHE Uscre Tom (a philanthropist) —* Just think, Rose, dear ; only Primus —* Buskin, 1 hear, is the star in Dingley’s play. Has he a sympa- __ Uscie T¢ five missionaries to twenty-four thousand cannibal thetic support? , . Rost —'* Goodness, how sad! The poor cannibals will starve Secundus —" Yes. Why, the applause always starts from behind the scenes.” to death. Surely they could send them a few more, uncle.” HE HAD SEEN THE WILD-WEST SHOW. SMALL Boys Puzzle, lend me your Sam Wait —"* Melican boy heap too smart. ——"“‘ Melican boy no yell at Sam Wah any more. tail for a clothes-line. Va, ya, Me showee him little tlick. beatee Buffalo Bill.” comicbooks.com