Judge — March 7, 1891 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A QUARREL between two noted actresses is so unfortunate, we must insist that Colonel Bill Brown be called upon for another dinner. eee MB. DANA hopes that the gods will be good to the New York Recorder. Probably it doesn’t occur to Mr. Dana that whom the gods love die young. ae GORMAN, it is said, has no small vices; and surely a man of his politics and ex- perience naturally has more or less contempt for things of that size Corer [DONNELLY wants one hundred thousand * dollars from the St. Paul Pioneer Press for libel. In behalf of the heirs of William Shakespeare we hope he may get it. eee THE CROW INDIANS are dying out faster than any other tribe. We have long been aware that the Crow Indians deserved the ut- most encouragement and consideration. WE MUST insist that cheating at cards is legitimate card-playing; or, if that is to be seriously disputed, that the prince of Wales must not be known by the company he keeps. S¢\VE WILL sweep the deck in the fall,” says the Albany Argus. How history repeats itself! It will be remembered that Mr. Adam made that identical prophecy to his fifth rib. WE CALL the camest attention of D. B. Hill to the fact that the Richmond State and various other southern newspapers say his allusions to Henry Watterson are both imperti- nent and insulting. 379 GAM JONES, according to a contemporary, is liable to come to an untimely end. Nothing could be more impossible. The ego- tism of the man admits of no surprise. If he were to be killed by lightning he would say, immediately on reaching the other shore, “ Do not be astonished. I knew it beforehand. 1 always die that way.” OUR OWNEST FIRE-EATER. WE DO WISH Brigadier- general Shepard would stop calling for a million men to whip the south again. ‘Pon honor war is a serious thing, and if we have to have one whenever there is a little or big crisis there won't be any kind of peace for more than fi minutes at atime. It is tough that a righteous measure should be beaten; but, after all, there are honest men who oppose it as well as honest men who support it, and if the former are to be hanged or shot or kicked because they won't or can’t think as the latter do there arises a power for evil that ought not to exist in any well-regulated republic. Come, come, ferocious soldier! Comb down the bristles of your hair and put a few bales of cotton in your eager ears. The world is not as good as it ought to be, but you and we will presently preach it into better humor. SARA. T 1S LUCKY for her husband that S. Bern- hardt never married. There is lightning in her eyes, and when she lets out her tongue in simulated ange: cat-o'-nine-tails sudden- ENTPUSIASTIC HOMAGE. ly loosed from an apparently hopeless tangle, Tom (during the milk-maid song)—"*Don't — €ach strand clean and supple and having you like it, Uncle?” Uncte Hackett—“* You bet I do!" snap to it like a fire-cracker. No other woma Tom" Why don't you applaud, then?” can hope to squeeze so many words into such Uxcte Hackett (in @ wild burst of enthusi- small space and shoot them out without the asm—" Hip, hip, hurrah A GREAT STORM at sea, and all but one man paralyzed with fear, “Sir,” says the captain with quivering voice to this man, “are you not alarmed ?” “Oh, no; not at all,” ha bright and cheerful smile. “1 come from Johnstown, Pennsylvania.” A SLIGHT “Ab, there, me chahmah! I recognize that angelic vc!zc.” r breakage of a line or a syllable. Others st fire, but Sara ejaculates conflagrations. A lit- tle too small for a tiger and a little too large for a cat, in her more exalted periods of fury she is not only both but the rest of the menagerie : and in her love she is as dangerous as a leopard with filed teeth and sharpened claws, We hope never to mect that woman alone. MISTAKE, Dinan —' Law, miss! you dess well come ‘long an’ talk thoo dis tel- efome you-se'f, ‘cause Mister Gawge done reco'nize my voice.” Y comicbooks.com