Judge — March 7, 1891 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. W. J. Ancaut. Beannano Giutam. 1. M. Garcory, Editor. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CANADA, One copy, one year. or s2 numbers. = One copy, six months. or 26 numoers = "2.50 One copy: for 13 weeks + += $ Including the Cumisratas Juocs $5.00 FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS To alt for- cign countries im the pottal union $6 @ year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupce Buitpine), Cor. Fifth Ave, and 10th St., New York: EW We cuarantee advertivers a larger circuiation at cheaper rates than any other American satirical paper published. The Juncn is for sale at Brentane's, 1 Avenue de [Opera, Paris, and by the Amer ican Newspaper dency at ts Kine William street, Strand, W. Cx, London. PROVERB—A bird in the bush waits for no man, UZZLE — What is the existing state of John Henry Starin’s political ambition ? eae \ HEAVEN our David will want two harps, and an extra one for use when a string breaks. PRISONER in Pennsylvania against whom there is much bad evidence would like’ to borrow A corpse. ‘ERAL SLOCUM being present, the publication of ew York Recorder will now —H. Carroll. E CANNOT indorse the claim of Teller of Colorado as a presidential candidate. His name that he would oppose the ion of Canada. CIPROCITY is free trade; but as Mr. Blaine is for re- ciprocity it ank barren idealty, not to say a hollow and subter- ranean subterfuge. — Democratic press THE indicat acqui AGRICULTURAL UTOPIA. NY READER of the article in Frank Leslie's Mlustrated Newspaper written by Senator-elect Peffer of Kansas, on “ Farmers’ Al- liance Wants,” will be impressed with the crude and impracticable ideas presented. Beyond question the intent and desire is an honest proposition to give influence to a large and intelligent class who have heretofore held themselves aloof from public affairs. The instinctive impression of the effort at rural elevation is its earnestness. There is a flavor partly puritan and partly socialistic in the argument. ‘The mothers, sisters and wives join in the assembly discussions, which are largely social and semi-religious in their character. Those familiar with farm life, who have had experience of its solitariness and isolation, can readily appreciate the attractions that would give common ground for gathering together. The interdict against any other than “soil-tillers” for mem- bership necessarily narrows the “ councils" into clannishness. The sym- phony of a solitary interest reverberates until it passes from grumbling to distrust and then is magnified into a wrong. Alll discussion is obvi- . ously one-sided. Differences of opinion are never allowed to shape into opposition and are countenanced only as a trivial diversion of opinion. With all looking at the world from the same standpoint of the furrow, a unanimity of conclusion is inevitable—they are right; the world of capital, trade, transportation, finance and government is wrong. Being at once judge and jury, with no council in opposition, the verdict is unanimous. ttt ‘The farmer who fancies he alone is the seed of wealth, and that all property and prosperity is a product of the soil, certainly deludes himself. ‘The hand that fells a tree is equal to the hand that cuts a stalk of wheat. Misder Parper.”” THE MANIPULATOR Mr. von Graetz— s gomblexion in valor.” A MILD DUELIST. Mr. von Graetz—"' Let der razor shlip ven you geds to der cheek, You don’t want me to cut yoy, do you?” Yah ; dot's it, Heidelpurg at der shdeamer in Hopoken, unt I vants der scar so | match The product is not a result of skill, as each is the creation of soil and sun, and the lumberman and reaper simply mow down a work not of man but of nature. The contrivance that builds a locomotive, shapes a ship, con- structs a loom, manipulates a mill, is as beneficent and necessary a helper of human comfort and advancement as he who snatches from the corn- stalk the resultant chemistry of nature to which his contribution was little else than the dropping of a seed. ttt Mr. Peffer indorses the belief that “the depression of agriculture is directly traceable to vicious legislation.” Were the high prices a few years ago the result of beneficent legislation? When and in what unknown way has there been a change in the laws? Did not light European har- vests and the absence of Australian and Argentine competitive crops have something to do with prices? Are not Hindoostan, with its recently added annual thirty-five millions, and South America, with its nearly one hundred millions bushels of wheat, poured into a glutted market, more likely than legislation to have produced agricultural depression? Is there any state or federal enactment that can successfully enlarge the European stomach ? Would it not be a shrewd thing for the farmers’ alliance to discuss some device for an expander? tet There is no greater shrinkage in wheat values than in iron values ; no greater lowering of crop prices than of cotton products. Why should the fifteen millions of farm- ers out of the sixty-five millions of people imagine that they are singled out to carry all the financial bur- dens? Are there not others who shoulder the load? Have not the manufacturers scraped the sugar of liberal profits down to tast- ing the aloes of the financial pill? Furthermore, is there any law that chains a man to a plow against his will and welfare? The opposition to alien ownership of land is an Americanism older than the alliance platform. The proposition to retain and open the national domain is not a new or novel plan, Would the alliance brother, however, be bet- tered by opening more donated acres to add more bushels to the already over- filled elevators? If ten per cent. less land were plowed and pastured the home, and not the Liverpool market, would be the market of the western farm. With. the twenty per cent. protective duty on wheat, and a proportionate one on every other agricultural product. even dur Canadian neighbots could 4 not compete. I meet me mein cousin from ttt hPattons ane Reqvareo |Nor To TAKE SNUFF | BcFORE BEING snmveo |sneezr NED. When the alliance can contrive some way of getting a,dollar with- out labor the age of miracles will be revived; even the tramp will join them and all will be happy. ttt It is a ridiculous idea that any government can manufacture money. Every penny in the treasury is gathered by taxes collected. A promise to pay is worthless without some assurance of payment. All government issues (unless receipted for in the shape of certificates of deposit) are sim- ply notes of demand. Even a government can multiply obligations to bankruptcy. As to the proposition to put railroads, telegraphs and money issues under government control, what should hinder working farms in the y? Carrying the proposition to its logical conclusion, should there be any restriction as to the business the government could undertake? ttt As to farm, municipal and other mortgages, were they given for nothing? Was the money really forced on the borrowers? _Is it possible that capitalists go around in the west and. plaster greenbacks on the resisting cuticle of the public? same tated Mr. Peffer says the farmers’ alliance “has set out to dethrone money and emancipate labor.” It has been tried before. It was temporarily successful in the French revolution, but that sanguinary effort unfortu- nately ended in an empire. Joa. comicbooks.com