Judge — October 25, 1890 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE THE FIRST FROST. SOMEHOW tthe scenes are blended— The grove and lighted hall, For when the summer ended The frost killed love and all. I sigh with foolish pity For what I suffered then, When she went to the city And I took up my pen. The stars ‘still shine, but coldly, The grove, the breezes sighing The grove is bare and cold; Were allies of my plea; H re once I wooed her boldly— Now wealth makes wooing buying, The summer made me bold. While love scorns poverty. Bat now the hall gleams brightly My love and summer's ended With splendor wrought of men, And frost is on my years, And here she greets me lightly, Yet still the scenes are blended Though I love her now as then. When gazed at through my tears. -DIDN’T ADMIT OF A DOUBT. N THE school-room. Teacher —“ Supposing a man who walks at the rate of six miles an hour should allow a man who can only walk four miles an hour to have one mile the start of him, where would they meet?” Several pupils (at once)—" At the first gin-mill.” THE LAST OF EARTH. +6] SEE dem litle pearly gates,” said the dying colored man, “What am beyond, fadder?” anxiously asked his son. “Bress my soul, chile! ef dar ain’t a angel cake-walk fur a melon ’s big “sa elephant.” A POINT AGAINST HIM. Witness (proceeding with his evidence) — The prisoner was looking straight at me"—— Prisoner's counsel (interrupting) —" Your honor, that is sufficient to im- peach the witness's testimony. You can see for yourself that my client is AN ARGUMENT FOR HOME MISSIONS. Reverend Mr. Givesom (trying to do a little good during his vacation) — “My dear young lady, do you think that just as you are now—a mere butter fly of fashion—you could be happy in heaven?” Butterfly of fashion —" Oh, yes. It’s such an exclusive place, isn’t it?” MIXING THE WEBSTERS UP. Laker (member of the Chicago literary society) —" Daniel Webster was noted for his diction.” c Livewayte (another member) —" Yes, sir; and also for his dictionary.” A DISCOURAGING EFFECT. Dolley —"You shouldn't smooth out your trousers like that when you lay them aside. It enlarges them.” A PREDICAMENT. Gostin —" Oh, that cahn’t be.” a O'Rovex —"* Begorra, phin Oi put me line t'roo that hole Oi Dolley—"Yes; if you fold any garment you will find it in creases.” must'r tought Of wor goin’ t' catch minnies !” THE MISSION TO TROY. ‘THE Grand Central depo Citizen —" One round-trip ticket to Troy.” Ticket - seller —“ Chicken fight or dog- “None of your business, sir! DISENCHANTMENT. (At the Academy exhibition) ENCHANTED CRITIC. ‘HEY pause before that columbine And apple-blossom spray. ‘Their taste quite coincides with mince— T'll listen what they say. What they say. wa. How much those apple-blooms resemble Pop-corn—I like it se/* EDITH, REVERTING TO THE PAST. Columbines always make me tremble— Moruen-sirer (in Chicago) —"* Just look, my son, and sce what a soft snap your ancestors used So like ‘pulled teeth, you know. to have,” MENRY TYRRELL. comicbooks.com