Judge, 1889-12 · page 10 of 53
Judge — December 1889 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a humor compilation page from *Judge* magazine mixing Christmas-themed jokes with satirical commentary on contemporary life and consumer culture. **"A Thrilling Tale"** shows a figure on a pole appearing to levitate or defying gravity—likely mocking melodramatic serialized fiction popular at the time. **"Stray Thoughts"** and **"Prophetic"** sections offer dry, cynical observations: Christmas forces poor men to work harder, poverty and overeating plague the holiday, and materialism dominates (suggesting wealthy suitors give expensive gifts or face romantic consequences). The "prophecy" that if Christmas falls Wednesday, New Year's will too is deliberately obvious satire of fortune-telling. **"Not a Freak on That Point"** jokes that a dwarf won't spend money on Christmas—dark humor about wealth disparities. **"Base Hits for Christmas"** uses baseball terminology to describe Christmas food (turkey, dressing, plum pudding). **"The 'Exclusive' Cigar-Holder"** satirizes consumer products claiming to solve trivial problems—poking fun at marketing excess. Overall, the page satirizes consumerism, class inequality, and how Christmas commercialism corrupts the holiday's supposed meaning.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
STRAY THOUGHTS. N EW JOKES about Christmas are as rare as flies in mid-winter. THE tramp may not par- take of the feast, but he may smack his lips at it. THERE are two ills that Christmas, poverty and dyspepsia. FEW men are so poor that they may not indulge in acigarette and a piece of pie at Christmas time. Avout the best thing about Christmas is that it enables most men to stop work for a day. THe fact that Christmas comes once every year has tempted many a man to embark in the dry- goods business. Snipkins — Why?” A THRILLING TALE. follow the celebration of * NOT A FREAK ON THAT POINT. Flipkins (pointing to a dwarf)—There’s a man who is quite un- likely to make any costly Christmas purchases.” PROPHETIC, JF IT RAINS on Christ- mas, the streets are apt to be wet. IF it snows on Christmas, prepare your galoches. If you do not, you will have wet feet. Ir Christmas falls on Wednesday this year New- year’s day will fall on the following Wednesday. IF you give your sweet- heart anything less costly than a diamond brooch See and tease you for six eS <<< months. = Ir you do not own a gold mine about Christmas time you'll be sorry for it. [This prophecy has been made before, but its repeti- tion is irresistible.] KATHAN M. LEVY, BASE HITS FOR CHRISTMAS. Out on a fowl—The turkey-coop. A hot liner —The dressing. Over the fence—The bird that was called and chosen. Flipkins —* He's too short.” A three-bagger —The plum-pudding. THE “EXCLUSIVE” CIGAR-HOLDER. Designed to prevent getting bad cigar-smoke in the owner's face. comicbooks.com