Judge — March 30, 1889 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE 41 JINGLEJAW'S JARGON. Breddern, at de las’ session er de weekly pra’r meetin’, de sex’on, de organ-blower an’ yo’ ‘umble sarbint war de sum totalum er partishioners gaddered ter prosercute de same. De ‘ten‘ance on deze Seances hab been grad’ally rappin’ off twell hit's got putty nigh onter one pea in de pod, an’ hit's come ter dat pass whar wese gotter ‘dop’ some meshurs ter yank dis congergation four deir aperty, or sell out dis sinergog fo' a hoss mokket or variety show. Las’ Chuseday ebenin’ war myst, ter be sho, an’ U knows dis congergation’s runnin’ ober wid invalids, but [tuk notice dat w'en. de sex’on an’ myse'f went de gran’ roun’s arter meetin’ we foun’ seben er der bred- dern at de cock fight, twenty-fo' at Deacon Dominoe’s. policy-shop, eleben at de tukkey-rafile, an’ erbout fo'ty sters at a pink kumys gub by de wife ob Elder Coopawn. Dis don't probe dey hain't invalids, but it shows dat dey's got ‘seazes dat hu'ts whar de climate sorter draws out deie sins fo’ public contemplation. an’ I specks we'll eider hab ter sen’ fo" ‘em in a amberlance eb'y pra'r-meetin’, or device some ways er makin’ de progance ‘cordin’ to deir sel"lum idees.— Yonkers Gazette. When Babs was sick, we gave her Castoria. When she was a Child, she cried for Castoria. When she became Miss, she clung to Castoria ‘When she had Children, she gave them Castoria Some clergymen are prime ministers. but they are sel- | dom called upon to head cabinets, — Pittsburg Chronicle, AT THE GREAT CENTENNIAL BALL. Sure I'm a dandy Gothamite, “The richest blood T claim, And if ye want to know any more, why MeAllister’s me name. And the raison Lam here to-night Is to tell ye's one and all Of the razzle-dazzle time we had At the great cintinnial ball. ‘There was Mike, and Dan, and Mary Ann and Paddy O'Toole, the fool, Pat Donahue and me. * Looroop boys,” ete. De Peyster axed ould Rutherford’s wife ‘To dance the quadruped; She smiled so sweet, but was afraid his head. ent did prance, nny Harrison skipped the lure In knickerbocker pants. ** Hooroop boys,” ete, Oil City Blizzard. Secure a sound mind, which seldom goes without sound digestion, by using the genuine Angostura Bitters of Dr. J. G. B.'Siegert & Sons, At all druggists. An independent old lady, speaking of Adam's naming all the animals, said she didn’t think he deserved any credit for naming the pig. Any one would know what to call him.—Christian Keg ister. “DANDRUFF should never be neglected, be- cause its natural end is in BALDNESS.” The persistence of ITCHING is peace-de- stroying and exhausting to the vital powers.” SCRATCHING is not nice, nor half as satisfying. asa SHAMPOO with PACKER'S Tar Soap ij, cures Dandruff and Skin Diseases, pre leaves the skin delightfully smooth, soft, elastic and healthful, Removes odors from perspiration, ete: 25 cents. Druggisis, or | THE PACKER MPG. CO., 100 Falton St., NewYork. | | ‘Sample (half cake), roc. stamps, if Jvocx is mentioned, THE CELEBRATED PIANOS Are at present the Most Popular and Preferred by Leading Artists, Warerooms, 149, 151, 153, 155 East 14th St, N.Y. SOHMER & CO. WA, Pai, 1103 Chestnut Stree AGO, Tut. 236 tz San Peaxctsco, Cat., Union Club Building: Sr. igo Olive Street Kansas Crry, Mo., 1123 Main SU “SWEET HOME.” Mrs, Bascom —* Does your husband enjoy sound There i lace like home" runs the old song, and | Sleep ?” P . we know haw (eels ne uns he old song, and’) "Mrs. Baclot—"* You just oughter hear him. ‘The impressions made in the home are lasting. A | “ington Free Press, mother’s words never pass from the mind, A. father's counsel remains fresh so long as life lasts. ‘The last| She was so inconsolable for the death of her husband benediction of parental love and soiciude—with what | shat when she played the piano she touched only the tenacity it clings to the memory when almost all else | black keys.—San Francisco Wasp has gone. — How important, therefore, that the home be mai tained intact as long as possible—a haven of loving THE counsel, of peace and joy tothe growing children. How sad when death invades, when the fire goes out on the | hearthstone and the family is scattered. What the children lose by the death of a parent only those realize e who have grown up without that love and advice which a parent alone can bestow. | ANYBODY can use the ‘There are tens of thousands of parents to-day in agony Kobak. The operation of mak- of mind through fear of death from kidney disease, who ing a picture consists simply of do not know they are doctoring only symptoms—such pressing a button, One Hun- as wakefulness, nervousness, a splendid feeling one day Gred instantaneous pictures are and an all-gone one another, dropsy, weak heart action, made without re-loading. No pneumonia, neuralgia, fickle appetite, etc., while the real dark room of chemicals neces trouble is ‘poisoned blood caused by diseased kidneys. | sary. A division of labor is Unless puritied with Wamer's Safe Cure they will just offered, whereby all.the work as surely die as though poisoned with arsenic. - ‘shi ieautes ts Doctors publicly admit that they cannot cure ad-| PRICE #25.00. o cele ycsores © done vanced kidney disease; they are too bigoted to use War-| can be sent to be re-loaded. ‘The operator need not ner's Safe Cure because it is an advertised remedy; con-| jearn anything about photography. He can ‘press the sequently, unless you use your own good judgment, | ution" —we ao the rest. secure and use Warner's Safe Cure, a specific which has| "Send for copy of KopAx Primer, with sample photo- proved itself in tens of thousands of cases to be all it is| graph. fepresented, your home, through your death, will be broken up and your loved ones deprived of that which| FHE EASTMAN DRY PLATE AND FILM CO., money cannot purchase or friends supply. moh, nS ochester, N, Y. Bur. A Berks county farmer has been made to believe that Nae ae his orchard will be leveled in order to cut off the cider CX iN RY Wedd 2OO® supply, in case the prohibitory amendment becomes. law, MEOOCE The anti-prohibitionist who “crammed” the credulous § ra : BLOSSOM & MDA granger forgot to tell him that he would also be pre- Yented from’ raising wheat and corn, in order to guard against the cereals being converted into whisky. —Norris- town Herald. If Olive Logan is right, and true domestic economy consists of “doing without things,” the simple-souled sirens of Samoa, who wear nothing but their back hair and their complexion, must Le greater as domestic econo- mists than Diogenes wasas a philosopher.— Trey Times. Flora—" 1 went down town yesterday and ordered me a tailor-made directoire suit. Carrie—"* Oh, did you? 1 went down town yesterday and ordered me a lawyer-made divorce suit."— Chicago Herald, If Mr. Cleveland doesn’t enjoy those ‘* four expres- sions in astatesman’s life” in the JUDGE, then he has no sense of humor, though the joke is at his expense.— Rochester Herald. After all this talk about a national flower it is becom- ing evident that the only flower which completely repre- sents this country is a daisy.— Pittsburg Dispatch, Mrs, Winks—" Well, Udeclare! ‘The weather indica- tions are right for once.” Mr, Winks (looking over his shoulder)—"* Humph! ‘That paper you've got is a week old." —Philedelphia Record, is Court ef Fustice.—Gosncil v. Durrast.—On Js tnt Aah coma unseat Renan eS Sia guaid opal Rema En Soe oes reas mvs WORTH A GUINEAL Oy BI ECHAMG 6 -PILL fer) RENT BICINE such as Wind and Pain in the Stomach, Sick Headachi ape, Flushings of t. Loss of Appe' Seana Blotches the Skin. Disturbed Sleep, Frightfel Dreams, and all Nervous and Trembling Sensations, &c. TH! FIRST DOSE WILL GIVE RELIEF IN TWENTY MINUTES. This is no fiction. Every sufferer is earnestly invited to try one Box of these Pills and they will be acknowledged to be a Wonder/ul Medicine BEECHAM'S PILLS. taken as directed, will quickly restore fem tocomplete health Fora WEAK STOMACH; IMPAIRED DIGESTION; DISORDED LIVER; they ACT LIKE MAGIC ;—a few doses will work wonders upon the Vital Organs: Strangthaning the muscultr System restoring long-lost Complexion; bringing back the keen edge of a and arousing with the ROSEBUD OF HEALTH the wehote physical eneray, of the human frame These are’ fects “admitted by tho fm all classes of soctety ; and one of the best guarantees to the Nervous and Debilitated is that BEECHAM'S PILLS HAVE THE LARGEST SALE. OF ANY PATENT MEDICINE IN THE WORLD. Full directions with each Box. Prepared only by THOS, BEECHAM, St. Helens, Lancashire, England, Sold by Druggists generally. B,F. ALLEN & CO., 365 and 367 Canal St., New York, Sole Agents for the United States, teho (if your druggist does not keep them—tnquive Arst) WILL MAIL BEECHAM’S PILLS ON RECEIPT OF PRICE 25 CENTS A BOX, In ordering mention Juvar. after Meals, Di comicbooks.com