Judge — 1888 — page 49: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NATURAL GAS MISDIRECTION. HE told her love and did not let Concealment, like a blighting worm, Feed on the roses of her cheek Or do her other beauties harm. Her aspect modest was, and meek ; And yet there was no epithet E’er known to honest ardency ‘That she did not pronounce to me! Her eyes downcast in ence— Her half-turned head, her trembling lips, Her face suffused, hands unemployed, And making many tell-tale slips As with a skein of silk they toyed Of happy choice gave evidence When she framed an apology For loving John instead of me. WELL STEERED. They got onto him at the Grand Central depot. he was and what a smile he had! He was on wheels and all he needed was pushing. He had a carpet bag with shiny ends and made of striped stair carpet, and his name and residence painted on it in white letters, 1. White, Rome, N. Y. The first man who shook the tree was a little fellow with a pock-marked face and a nobby summer suit and white vest. “Why, White!” said he, “I was sent up to look for you. Jenkins, who used to live in Rome, said you would want a good quiet hotel.” “Land sakes!” said White, ‘tis Jenkins here in the city?” “Yes,” the youth with the indented cheek, “he came down yesterday and he told me to take you to the Bulge house on Chambers street.” “Is there a safe in the house?” said White, looking down ap- prehensively at the carpet bag. “Safe !” said the warm hearted youth ; “there is a regular bank vault, perfectly safe. Ah, here is Mackin. Mackin, this is my friend White, from Rome.” “Glad tew know ye, Mr. Mackin,” id White, and he picked up the carpet-bag and held it behind him. This was nuts to Mackin and his friend and they winked rapturously to each other. “Do you ever drink?” said Mackin pleasantly. “Wall, sometimes I take asnort for luck,” said White. “Well let's go over and lubricate,” said the kind young man, At the saloon the carpet-bag was cal fully placed under White's chair and the nobby youth carefully lifted it with his toe. Then he said it was about time to take a lunch, and White was pressed to indulge in quail on toast, some little-neck clams and his share of a bottle of wine. Then in a cab they started for the hotel and White held the carpet-bag on his lap. The hotel on Chambers street was rather quiet and White looked around for the safe. The room looked more like an office, and a cashier at a desk seemed to be busy looking over some slips of paper. “When will it draw?” said Mackin, as he took out his pocketbook and looked at some similar slips of paper. Oh, how ripe & ON THE BOX. Mrs. Densuane -*‘ Here come the Van Amringes, Harold. them at Narragansett. Shall I bow?” Mr. Densvabe—“ Decidedly no! FROM JUDGE. When Van Amringe pulled me out of the watah after that beastly cramp, y’ know, he was cad enough to get mad when I asked him which Turkish bath establishment he was employed at in the city.” A SURE EVIDENCE. Minister (who has had a‘ call” to the pastorate of a neighboring congrega- tion, with deep humility)—* Ot course, gentlemen, ‘tis my sacred duty to be- come your pastor, if 1 am convince reat Master, Ahem—by the way—what may the pre! r—salary be, as it were 2” VISITING CoMMITTE: € hundred dollars more than your present cure affords.” MINISTER (seith a deep si must be a call from my he all from of Christian resignation)— Ah! then indeed this nly Master!” “They are all in but 120, 1060 and 42, and the capital prize is back yet among those numbers,” said the cashier. “Great Scott!” said Mackin, “look here White! The capital prize is among these numbers of mine and I propose you fel- lows give me a hundred a piece and each of us chance a num- ber on the prize. I have all three of those numbers.” “All right,” said Jackson, “here’s my hundred,” and he whis- pered to White, ‘Put in your hundred, and we will divide which- ever gets it.” Several men strolled up to the cashier's desk and threw down money for new tickets and business was rushing right along. White went and carefully closed the street door and then began to unlock his carpet-bag. A hush fell on the scene as White id in a cautious tone, ‘Say, fellers, I ain’t got but three dollars in cash with me, but here in this ere valise”——They held their breaths and gathered around “In this here valise I hev got the model of the golfire- dest geewhilliken rotary churn that ever knocked butter out of sour cream. Now I'll take a chance in yer raffle and trade yew town rights till yew can't rest. They ain't nothin’ mean about me, and”—but a howl of rage went up from that carefully prepared office, and the carpet-bag, model and all, was kicked into the street. cen | ® White told the policeman who helped him to his feet and brushed his clothes off, that he “never met a freer- hearted lot of boys, nor never sot down to a better meal” than they treated him to, but “they hadn't no taste for mechanical in- genuity;” that “some fellers from New England would buy the churn,” and they did. You femember we met comicbooks.com