Judge — 1888 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

CHEST NUTS FROM JUDGE. THE OLD-FASHIONED TROUSERS STRETCHER. That is probably why a woman never scruples to lavish her hus- band’s money... . Judging by the day, hell must be a bigger place than heaven. .Man loves from im- pulse ; woman from sympathy... A boy looks at the result; a man at the consequences... Man works to earn money ; woman to spend it....We appear most foolish to our friends when we think our- stronger than modesty in woman show her hose than bedraggle her skirts......Man judges with his We are told it is better to be born lucky than rich. But, after all, if we arc rich we can casil; a little ill-luck....Man to mourn ; woman to m do so....'*Go forth and pambol on the green” is a precept that SAYINGS OF MRS. PUGWASH. There are some men in this world so chivalrous that they love all women except their own wives....In shaking a carpet the wise man always gets to windward... To most of us the sands of life are quick- sands....The lover who dives into a poke bonnet to kiss his girl may be said to be head and cars in love....The poor are always with us because we seldom give them anything....Experience is a teacher that never spares the rod....The difference between the miser and the spendthrift is as the shadow is to the substance. The one loves money ; the other what money will buy... living by seeking for the truth, but who never find it for fear of losing their job... The rolling stone gathers no moss. It is the rolling snow-bail that scoops up every- thing.... Life is a race where we all like to go as we please... Charity begins at home. . There are many men who make a | was never written of the turf... . Itis the fly in the milk-bowl that gets along swimmingly....There is no saying truer than “as easy as kiss”—providing, of course, that the girl will let you.... Joaquin Miller, with his long hair and eccentric avays, looks more poetical than he is....It isn’t the millionaires who keep the money in circulation. The rich man hoards ; the poor man spends....It is the terms of the midwife that are always c.o.d. Itis the artificial fly that takes the rise out of the trout... This would be a queer world if everyone had his own way .. Wealth may not make one happy, but with- out it few are happy....Homeliness is a drawback to a man; in a woman it is a | crime... The pinch of poverty is sharper than that of the pincers....It is easy for an ugly woman to sneer at the mistake of her pretty sister, for she knows nothing of temptation....It is easy for one to hide his ignorance and pass through life as a wise | man, if he only holds his tongue .. With kind of men who are dying cvery | selves most wise......Pride is | On a rainy day she would sooner | brain; woman with her cyc.... | WANTED, By a young man, who at present occupies a position somewhat difficult to si with dignity, a chance to rise in the world, or get on his feet again. RESULTS OF CIVIL SERVICE. First sTRanGer (to policeman)—“Can you tell me where the First Methodist Church is?” Pouicetan (unconcernedly)—* No, you had better consult the directory.” Seconp sTRANGER (in an off-hand way)— ‘Whereabouts is the Haymarket?” Poticeatax (full of information)—“ Second sir; our society woman it is neck or nothing. | corner to the right.” Little Gamin (in loud voice, to companion)—“ Hi, Jimmy ! Look out, here comes a mad dog !” The Blind Cripple did not wish to make a visit to Paris, but he will have to ply his vocation in some other section of the country after this. Youth! Youth! Youth: THE DAYS OF MY YOUTH! WHERE ARE THEY? Experience answers: They are to be found in the Disease-Expelling, Bloot-Disinfecting and Beauty: Restoring (Saft) ARSENIC COMPLEXION. WAFEES, What “Society” says or chem may be learned from the pages of this book. comicbooks.com