Judge — September 10, 1887 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Uncle Rethuel tries some of the Gitthar” HUM OF THE They have strawberri January ; variety of fall turnips and COURT. in San Francisco in every month but but who cares for strawberries ? The pictures of base-ball pl pictorials show a large developm: ness of chin, it being nec action, The Philadelphia Chronicle-Herald $s Billy Mahone is as small in stature as he is in principle. Now let us be reasonable, Of course, if that were the case little Billy would be a nonentity physically as well as mental. There will presently be a bathing costume without lock, stock or barrel, as they used to say of a certain kind of ima by that time * Clara Belle” will be so happy that she will not be able to contain herself in one of them. yers which appear in the daily it of moustache and great naked- y that the chin should have free Somebody suggests a new kind of duel, the governin: be ‘chin at two miles.” The Tribune and the Times of this dorse it with the exception of the miles. What they want is adis- tance of about a hundred feet. Jeff Davis objects to prohibitic rules to. because it makes the individual the servant of the m and really if there is to be tyranny it ar better to let the individual take charge of himself and run himself to the utmost of his superior weakness and ugliness. We never think of Henry Stanley without being embarrassed as to whether to weepor be complacent. If Henry would only consent to live or die, and make one job of it, he would confer a boon upon the too impulsive and emotional hu nan countenance. y, widow of Wilbur F, of the Chicago Times, has been litigating four years, and as there is much property left she ane A COLLECT. purted a lady of culture and learning : With lov My rivals informed m In divers att 1 in various stages Of hopeless affe-tion, were wooing the siren I vainly imagined my love could environ, I sought her—my heart in a state of distress— To force her her coquetry hase to confess. My lady-love no sooner bade me be seated Than briefly the tates I had heard I repeated. Then icily asked, ‘* Are your enemies right, ma‘am, Anil is it done daily from morning till night, ma’am? She drew herself up in a way that was painful, Vi mely disdainful, nt is right, sir: “Tis true ‘tis 1 Go tell my ¢ actors, your would-be protectors, The callers thi y warn you against are —collectors.” m4 cutive will be mentioned long hence as one of the ¢ stories, and there will be written on her “She never found it. I suppose I could easily mention the American novelist, but modesty prevents.—W Howells. A Te: chews his weight in tobacco every four years, and is half inclined to be ashamed of himself because he can’t do it in two. Now that it is announced that the fri Cameron is going to come home, there is a fee intense relief among the married men of the effete east. A woman predicted that the falls of Niag would run dry on the 15th of August, and now vindicates herself with the excuse that there wa much water to permit the experiment. There is a report that the princess Beatrice hen pecks her Henry even to the extent of making him get upto get the paregoric; but wehave it from private sources that the queen attends to that baby sists—with Lord Salisbury’s permission—on manag ing the paregoric herself. It is well enough in yiv- ing foreign information, to have things correct. Some black people down south believe that the moon 1s occupied by Adam, Eve and the serpent, that the first mentioned is continually at work br ing the serpent’s head. Better late than never. Adam was so exceedingly remiss in le: the garde before he had mashed that reptiles ead that heought Finds that his instincts of self-preservation have pot gone bac! to be condemned to that exercise until the day of judgment, as these black persons aay he is. We had much of an opinion Adam, but if he is redeeming himself in that way be will eventually be all right. Mr. Noah's ark may have been, as stated, a badly-ventilated vessel; but not half as much soas the story about the ark, which has been rid dled by the investigutors until there is nothing left of it but a sieve the connecting sources of which are merely a matter of remembrance. A contemporary has a pathetic story of a railroad conductor who sweethearts, and yet who died. | Of course, tha n who dies with five sweethearts on his hands is so utterly ur nd unreasonable that he cannot possibly have had anythin that required dying in order to get rid of it. t is impossible grateful