Judge — July 30, 1887 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NOT CUPID'S DART. Near-atonren ancien — Hello ! who could have put my target way out there: I wonder if 1 can hit the bull's eye from here HUM OF THE COURT. In dying Herr Krupp, the celebrated cannon-maker, has gone off with as much success as one of his big guns That is the best speech which has the was ever a success as a speech-maker either before or and no woman fter dinner, y have been a stuttering won but there were seven ays in the week during which she was hippily relieved of her disa- bility. The were re: was also revived the report that the moon was composed. princi- pally of green cheese. “ When a man is in Rome says the Utica Herald, “he she do as the Romans do.” So? Wouldn't it be quite as well for him to keep sober ? William D, Howells has a poor opinion of all the novelists nd his modesty won't n to mention that one’s name. Mr. Barnum | picked the other di was so mad th noted line ch: for me—I am goin: The Buffalo Commercial Advertiser says women are excit- able and betray their emotions more than men. Dear youth, isn't that superfluous informa: tion ? Isn't that what they large are here for ? King Kalakaua isallowed to retain his throne on the single condition that he exercise none of its privileges. That is about as if he were allowed to eat provided he did not the slightest swallow- ing. 1 his pocket and he he ordered that nged to * Do not. The queen having given £200 for the relief of distressed clergy- men, there has arisen some little discussion with regard to their di tressed congregations. As ageneral thing, as the reader is aware, tho unhappy individuals are rarely thought of. Tf it is true, as alleged, that Mrs. Cleveland is superstitious, then she and Grover are well matched ; and yet there is a vast difference between the gentle expectation so called and coaxed and the coarse matter that Grover calls bullhead luck. Then again, if she is super- MODERN COURSE OF STUDIES, Foxp ratnex—" Well, my buy, what course do you intend taking this year : me as last year.” Let me see, what course did you take last year Sox—" Race-course, She didn’t quite do it, but made an admirable attempt stitious the head luck adidate must inevitably be D. B. Hill, because the bull. ine to the end of its rope several weeks ago. A contemporary revives the statement that Boston ladies are blue. stockings ; but we may at least quote in their defence the well-known fact that of late years they do not wear the kind of stocking that crocks off, They tell of a beardless, bald-headed man of Philadelphia who awoke after a sweet night's rest to find his head covered with hair and his face with whiskers, The medicine of Lydia Pinkham must have taken to itself some new properties, or else the newspapers have got up a new kind of he. Queen Natalie of Servi to the czar and told him her hus: band had been onducting himself, We suppose she did it because the czar is very much given to that sort of thin elf and it would be very make him understand. Henry Ward Beecher appeared ata spiritual seance in Brooklyn the other night and chipped inan extract from an old lecture by way of contributing to the enter: tainment. “That's strange,” said Major Pond sadly when he heard of it. “Henry must have deteriorated. He never played it on an audience like that when he was under my management.” There are men who have such delicacy of apprehension regard ing music that when the angel Gabriel toots his horn they will agitate their dust suffi tly to say, ‘ Well, by Jove ! if that’s the kind of noise they are going to give usin the celestial man- sions you can count me out of the resurrection.” went him y to Mr. Ignatius Donnelly’sShakes- pea exposition shows conclusively not only that Francis Bacon wrote the plays but that the gentleman of Avon did the Junius letters and the several chapters of Genesis. It is a big thing. Figaro of Paris says Mr. Cleveland is openly accused not only of a purpose of bribing the south but of being in love with his wife. Whatever may be said of the first charge, the other isa campaign false- hood which would do no discredit to the American newspaper. We beg to assure our Parisian contemporary that it is the custom here, as well as in its locality, to be in love only with the wife of some other individual. comicbooks.com