Judge — January 8, 1887 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

4 Mum of the Court. | ‘Tracy Titus and Alice Oates are said to be dying, the former for love of Alice and Alice for love of herself. We do not believe that Amos Cummings did that express robbery, but he had better stop writing letters to the papers about it. We learn from the Sun that a male doe was recently killed near Middletown,N. Y. Appar- ently it wasn’t the office cat that killed it. The Rev. Mr. Kennard of Chicago says he never yet saw a ballet. Well, when a few dollars will buy the privilege what is he whin- ing about? Pastor Goodell insists that he is innocent He may be, but it is understood that he had the intimate acquaintance of Mrs. Goodell a number of years. “Clara Belle” reads character at the opera in the backs of the ladies there present. There must be a good deal of character in that ex- panse of territory. The Rochester Post-Express says Whitelaw | Reid was once madly in love with Anna Dick- | inson. This is a compliment to both parties | which we are sure is fully deserved. A contemporary says Tennyson's poem is improved by being read as awhole. The orig- inal impression was that it was improved by | betng read as a hal erhaps as a sixteenth. The king of Belgium ordering around our Henry M. Stanley is a spectacle we had hoped not to see ; but it relieves the explorer of a hateful responsibility—he needn't lecture now. Jim Cummings tried to be cunning, but it turned out that the detectives were more so than he was. Whatever may be said of the shoemaker, the thief had better stick to his jimmy. Mrs. Eldridge of Howell, Mich., was orgini- nally black. Of late years she has been gradu- ally turning white, and the other day she gave up all hope of retaining her original color; and incontinently died. | The editor of the Dansville Breeze has dis- covered a woman with warm feet. So he says; but if he expects that his bare word is going to be accepted in these important premises he's very much mistaken, The Philadelphia News says it is once more possible to walk the streets of its city without overshoes. We take it, accordingly, that the inhabitants can now turn a corner without leaving the sidewalk. Sain Jones talks foolishness when he says a man should be ninety-five per cent. backbone. Too much backbone means stupidity ; and a man thus made up would be more to be avoided than a kicking mule. The ex-chief cook of the white house says Mrs. Cleveland used to call him ‘Charley. He isn’t naturally a vain man, but if there are any big sunflowers that are happier than he they must be chrysanthemums. The Graphic proposes that Lord Colin Campbell come out as manager of an English burlesque company. Then he wants to do! another thing. He wants to stay away from | this country just as hard as he can. | The Elmira Telegram tells how Governor | Hill once rescued a beautiful young woman from drowning, If the story had the usual “ So hellup me kraciou would call it the most_ pernicious activity yet. We look upon Sir Charles Dilke as a vindi- cated man; certainly his case was harmless and noiseless in comparison with that of the Campbells. He can even set himself up as a model of virtue if somebody will kindly fur- nish the requisite pedestal. ASt. Louis paper says they are gathering hay in the streets of Chicago Ocean replies that theSt. Louisman who finds himself in a Chicago street inquires, ‘* Where's the fire?” These amenities have gone far enough. There'll be murder presently. Miss Winnie Davis says she finds more en- terprise in the north than she had anticipated. After his experience Mr. D. might have in- structed her on that point. There is an awfy) sight of enterprise around here when there is jan urgent call for it. When the authorities of Packer institute want to praise a student for something they say, ‘This is a feather in your cap, dea | whereupon the dear begins to weep and says, between sobs, ‘‘Alas! here is robbery of an. other pretty bird. The editor of the Dansville Breeze aient to one’s intelligen ith a book, and his choice pocket- book. Here is a suggestion as to raising the wind which the editor of the Breeze ought not to consider necessary. [0 present The Courier-Journal says the cabinet is made up of three able debaters who ought to be in the senate and four nobodics who know as lit tle of federal affairs as the president himself. If tke four nobodies are at all sensitive they won't be happy till they hit H. Watterson with a club. They say that ladies can never become good sleight-of-hand performers; yet there is that |lady of Detroit, Mich., who, trying to hit her uncle with a club, inflicted a bad wound on the very back of her head, put her shoulder out of joint, and knocked into small pieces every globe of a chandelier ten feet above her | bonnet. ‘We never know how strong is the force of |habit until we find ourselves writing the old | date on a letter, Pd TS hPa IES Le Rad new.over god ay our handsome bric-a:brac, TNs ending there is a man in Washington who < YW jut the spittoon onthe table. PMang the scuttle on the wall, ‘Fake the vase from off the what Jmatroid'that-itmay fall. bys cep the floor up‘every Nour W 4 A Peatentorr ese Pins, 4 And be caretul with those graccs = \Wherevyou lay the sking, 3 here! just now told yous” 7 Dt course you never think , ‘The Muclage nas been upset. my ink. bought the other,day, With every useful articie, Fy, 88 safely hid away What a cheerless:looking room. Ot realty makes me grodn, Cvery Thing has been removed, aby walks alone,