Judge — December 4, 1886 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“Lawrence, shall we throw ourselves upon her, seize the growler and retire to some secluded nook and enjoy ourselves ax men, or how 7" “Nay, Marcellus; she is a female and entitled to every con- sideration at our hands. Let's offer to purchase the contents of the growler; then if she refuses your idea will be worth con- sidering.” = tletoe ? The great secret in the Moen-Wilson case— How is Wilson going to raise that $96,000 ? As the daughter of the confederacy, Miss Winnie Davis can hardly be expected to be a wise child. Seven cities claimed Homer, and twice that number of cities disclaim all knowledge of Patrick Ryan. One often feels, in view of the small waist of the period, as if he were putting out his arm to The Rochester Union shows its disposition to make the best of everything by remarking | that the weather, though bad, is better than none. Mrs, Cleveland is an early riser and Mr. Cleveland isn’t; hence the remark every morn- ing, “By heavens, Frances! if you don't go away [Il remove you for pernicious activity.” | The Ohio young lady who has received | twenty-nine offers of marriage during the past year must have kept a tremendous amount of very poor company. The president is working hard to reduce his flesh. There was a prevalent impression a couple of weeks ago that he was working hard to reduce his majorities. Newspaper logic—The Schwatka expedition carried arsenic, and three little Indians, getting posession of it, were poisoned to death. There- fore, according to the Sun, George Jones is guilty of murder. ~ it on the chandelier. Who Ham of the Court, |. every time he wants to take her under the mis- | Sing who are declining both|733 pounds, has to be courted in sections, and | mentally and physically. Why|by the time her sweetheart has captured the should there not be alarm for/entire structure he will be an old man. And them as well as for James D.|serve him right. Why should he encourage Fish ? these bloated monopolies ? Colonel Ingersoll sys his throat is all right, the little tumor that troubled him having "ahs contemplates jon from been one of the benign kind. We never did [pprtiedar ans suppose there could be a tumor of that tenden- it, and then it will remark to ate 9 } then. cy, and letus hope that the colonel’s infidelity the erring sister that she had sey alld cod lavely? | better remain in peace. oa bit | . Mr. Carlisle says the free-trade fight will go We dare say nobody will ac-| right on. It would appear from this that all cuse the editor of the Saratoga|the free-traders except Mr. Carlisle were not Journal of that express rob-|xilled off in the late elections. That is odd if bery, but how does it happen jit is a fact, and foolish if it is a falsehood. that he has so much of the| ; — stolen money in his possession?} Ina Canadian town the other day a man was fined five dollars for calling another man The girls of Packer institute a puppy. If he had mentioned him as a dog will wear no more feathers or|it would have cost him a hundred, and if as wings in their hats, having|an elephant he might have been fined his pity for the pretty birds. 2a entire fortune. i isa thing, but we} = . . wappoes i feared they were| _ Little Benzine tried to see his wife behind getting too fly. the scenes in a Brooklyn theatre, and the authorities of the same were so shocked that The man who likes to have/they threatened to have him locked up. Next his name appear at the end of|time he'll know enough, the rude fellow ! to Apparently thenorth will tol- erate Miss Winnie Davis until | indorsements of certain medi-|inquire for some other man’s wife. cines is even willing to testify tothe value of the compounds| The interviews leading up to that result | of Lydia Winkham, Now it have been sacredly private, but all the same Mr. Lowell is to marry a titled English widow. That is the kind of irreparable injury he de- |serves, and may it make him happy and ami- lable for a hundred years to come. i} seems to us that that is ridicu- lous. English horticulturists plan mistletoe on apple-trees. It) 4 young woman of Howell, Mich., had been seems tous that at this season’ poading dime-novels, and the other night she it would be far better to plant ),ooked a horse and wagon and started for the i |plains. If they bad let her alone she would wants to go out in the cold’ jaye scalped several Indians and kidnapped as many young men by this time ; but they ar |rested her and so nipped the romance in its in- Winnie Johnson of Cincinnati, who weighs cipient bud... MORE POINTED THAN POLITE. ‘Wire—“ You haven't been inside of a church since we were married--there !" There are perhaps a number of men at Sing Huspaxp—“‘ No ; a burnt child dreads the fire.”