Judge — August 7, 1886 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ANOTHER TEMPERANCE FRAUD. f k table mit bromptness unt dis- i ad proke. Dot is der gindt Jufasummer redreat olt Castle Garden vas. Vell—dot's righd, Chonny, get a stick eandy—I dink dis vas goot ke- noof gountry for me, Oof I vas infited ofer here, Ch PY a gommittee fon der senate, or a syndicate uf r bresidents, or a coverment surfey or somedings, I hafe a righd to oxpress an obinion on der bolitical economy uf der gountry. You see ? But you hear me, Chonn: ¥ to dis gountry ofer not for my healt or for a sheap exeur. sion der scenery to take rin. I coom dot ocean across mit an abbetite pigger asa vagon load uf straw unt not | money enough to puy a match. Der leedle poy Chonny, dem got lots uf fun mit my bants. dot bants, Chonny, you die mit laughing. Dere vas four yarts uf cloth in der seat, unt py chimmetty! ven a Duteh- man peen in dis gountry fife years dot bants vould che him to death in der seat. Dot's a goot kenoof goun: me. I vork on der sdreets. I peen drive on der I peddles a meat-market. I been dake c nickels, unt der dimes dake care uf himselluf, unt | money der bank in, unt a peer saloon mit bologna * worst unt sweitzer kase in der pack room. Dot's kenoof gountry for me. A man vot fints fi fer de Mokeville | gountry vould fint fault mit his ¢ temp'unce sas-| vas oniy blated. Der door on der Castle siety, and Td be glad. fer) ote vays, unt if der anargists tont like der ter hab yer name, sa Farmer—" What are yi e. Der bapers sait somedings apoud der doing with that flask in| ooprising ¢ Vell, I dell you how to make your other pocket jooprising dot efery pody viil like. Yoost make it mit some Vistror—* Flisk ?—er—r— | popes unt bullys unt weigh flisk? Dat yaint no flisk.) + Pretty good, Strauss; but do you know your name ought Dat's a yempty bottle, boss, 4 be in a bureau ?” en when I git home I'll Lest “Chonny, pime py you sait sometings unt I knock your ey a . de rontents in de gutter, fh) sutsides all inwards. “Vot you mean ¢ My name peen all panini : righd at der bank, dot pureau vas oush-k-spield.” : “Lecture bureau, Strauss. You've talked an hour and - - = - -| never took a cent at the door.” STRAUSS ON THE ANARCHISTS. |somedings like dis: ‘Speak vell Dot’s all righd. I yoost dell you, Chonny, Laind no so |dot pridge aboud dot brings you |cialist or anargist. I got a vife Loweesa unt der bapy, unt 4, across.’ Ver stachen sie? You |dey bote look like me, unt I dond vant to shoot der ilag or ELL.Chon- | umble to dot, Chonny? Oof | bust oop der gountry. Dot gountry gits along petter mit ny, how dont like dis gountry den I goes /out me dan I gets along mitout der gountry. Dot gountry you Vas |right avay pack. Castle Garden |vas like mine peer saloon unt Mike Swartz, Mike goes Peen all aond vas like apeer garden. You [along unt chokes Loweesa apout der bapy unt pats der vile f got a blace in ut uf you dond unt py y Grashus! he vas as ni The newsboy threw | yoend a cent. It vas open der away his cigarette, | sear all roundt, unt der vaiters |den he dells efery pody dot Loweest unt der bapy unt der ; y Le folding wp Mis! ond look at your clothes, aber ‘dog vas got a fambly resemblance, wnt I got to stash bis jast paper stuel ? . in his pocket and | dropped into a chair | near the door. THOSE FERTILIZING RAINS. Deon: Too thin—William M. Evarts. Too thick—U Ben Butler. rauss, said he, ** dese anarchists y frauds, but dey sell I wish I was in Chi- And votish der matter mit Chicago? f Hi ‘A UIVERY STABLE BILL. Read der news fon der baper oud, Chonny.” / / | ‘li aeeeenctaan. “Why, they can’t git no jury, Strauss.” 4 / ~ i “No chury, Chonny ? Oxplain dot curious shtate of dings vile I put some fresh sant by der floor.” “Why you see if a feller has told what he thinks about the anarchists—expressing an 7 hay opinion they call it—he can’t sit on the jury. i & * getting of him bom 4 horse a half aday unt py chiminetty ! I baed you na ' Ae ‘ -— Tcouldn’t sit down on dotehu Chonny, og \ j | CAUSE To REJOICE. if der vellers vot drowned demsellufs by der Lat, nie a vas vash dem- sellufs oop on der shore Chicago py, dey vould hat an opinion on dem an seen in der bapers de veek—vas Tuesday, ain’d it ?” ‘Yaas, shot into the flag right in open day-| light. They are getting pretty fresh, Strauss.” Mrs ITH (can- “Dem vas most too fresh to geep in ¥arm |) psnyen—«T tell you though these ere rains do make the craps grow.” | didlyy—" Yes; Tam vedder, Chonny. Oof you could read Cher-| Crry poarprr— Yes: I just noticed that it has increased your crop ofl si. narried asain.” man ungerstand I would some broverbs | milk to nearly double what it was before the rain commenced.” au - is Brown (kindly)- |[ haven't seen you look so happy since your husband died I suppose you are be. coming resigned to | your sad loss.” comicbooks.com