Judge — December 26, 1885 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Origin of the Dollar Mark (8). Wh Uncle Sam found the sign by » conquers has been much disputed vians, statesme jurists, arehwologi plagiaris's, numismutists and sts who write the wers LO Cor. in country and agricultural in the case of the eminent id, nobody has asked ‘ plain the origin of the & u2 he has no dollar of his own toaccount for he will try to account for his uncle's. Th ions that have been all hypothetical, apochryphal and e cal. One man says it represents the « rpent twit und the two pillars on the old Mexiean coin. Another that it is the result of the attempt of the initials: * U.S.,” trying to hide behind each other when Lord Howe invaded this country, and th is Howe the yot twi round the so it could never be untangle ‘The true story of the mark is now for the first time given publi other paper has it, scientists, papers, savants afor JUDGE toe in of the de to the A bad When the Pilgrim search of free institut they secured was wh not have in the full at night on it, ‘aay erated parent and not fecl it “tb up the next morning afte town meeting or general training with a head clear asa bell. Bat in time, like cold w it would ** fetch ‘em all.” One of the most pious of the Puritans ran a dis- tlk and because he could get all he wanted without ing for it or having it chalked up, he got to liking the stuff. Jt ended in the jim jams, fathers came over in wf the boons as they d pull sinly as vou ever _ ader, along snake come out of one of his boots in single file and ascend his legs in a big ** bracing from side toside as man straddles his way up the well, But.unlike von, gentle was enongh for this Poritan, and atuck. The way he managed to stay was by con ho saw as 1 ides of ler. once He swore off "novelists it is different.” Th cashie THE JUDGE. vtly reminding himself of that snake zig- Wheneve: the minis he he $ anip with apicture of | his legs crossed by that snake, (8). Then he'd shudder and swear off again, — So his books were covered all over with that awful example, next to the amounts charged. For instance: | Rev, Jonathan Nebat Si 1Gal, Wh., hf. price Snatched from-the Burnin oO BbL wh the- Ways-of the To 1 pint wh. Peletiah Jahazcal Shekin To 11 Drinks wh. at 2¢. [snake, or @] 12 Hholomew, {big snuke] 2 2 1 Whiceler. {snake} ah 1 Smith, is###] 262 (This last ch had evidently made the pious Puritan extraordinarily thirsty.) He got rich very fust and mysteriously and Was a meaner man than when he hud the snake in bis be When he died ul looked for the secret of his wealth in his books. ‘The & was the only exphination that they found, and the superstitions Puri- tans adopted that asa sort of «money charm; in their ignorance they did not adopt the ab- stinence policy for which the cabalistie sign stood. It has been handed down in the same ignorant ws people now keep right on using it and fooling around the snakea at the same time, ‘The only trace of its eff ey left, acharm, is that whiskey-sellin; as of old, most frequently multiplies the &. only true history, but if any able millionaire or gin-mill_ proprie- iy Vassar or Sterling, does not like it, we can furnish other accounts on approval. In writing history the historian can please his readers if he has any ingenuity, With have to con- serve probability CB. B. Exeases. Mus. Jones—*Oh, how de do, Lue Why didn’t your ma come over to my quilt- ing the other day?” Lecy—*I don’t know, but I heard her tell pa that you wasn’t hospital enough.” Lost the Combination. «ith was sent to the store to buy aspool of thread. She came back without it. “Why, Edith!” said her mamma, didn’t you get the thread? ” “Cause I forgot what “why you wanted.” “Caaash!” ‘Two old ladies in a New York store, Firat Old Lady—* Say, "Liza Ann, what do they keep a bollerin’ to for?” Second Old Lady—" Why don’t you use your ears? Thes're a hollerin’ for the of course.” Off His Reckoning. An old gentleman got on a bobtal car, the other day, and after sitting some time he nudged « smart your who sat next him and said, pointing to the indi * Neighbor, Mina little nearsighted, would you pl tell me the time?” CAROL OF THE CASHIER. Now, ify In life to take Just listen to the words [have to say: Get i ya wish to rise good bank, And very al rank Amon ys of the day. ‘To do this you must be A man of courtesy, And very, very seldom take adi But wear a patent That's innocent of guile For that’s the kind of a cashier that Tam! You must sport a costly suit, A diamond pin 10 boot, And move within the best society; Aw Become a shin' Son Be always on the lay And keep on in this way, F people will not think that you're a sham: And never, night and day, to wa For that's the kind of « if in chuseh youn light F gnme ch the better you seet I prey, ashicr that Lam! You must keep ye: That nobody but § Can tell exactly how finances So when the trustees eon You can figure up» sum Of profits, that will make their Learts beat bi And never let your hold Relax from stolen geld, But grab on all the boodle t Then wildly «peculate, nd rely For that’s the ki at you ean; asbier that 1 am! And wh The time a-deawing nigh When everybody will be ther in the 1 pack your carpet | ie same as all defaulte Jast you spy nto you; ard with merry glee + vietins’ misery. their suffering never care Did your friends tata hier that Lam? Thom, Ww. TREAILOER, A Head-Center. Mrs, Bucolic—* Mr. Commercial, do you know Mr. genius Smith, who is making stich a stir in our little society this winter? Mr. Commercial (signiticuntly)—** 1 think I have heard « Mra. Ib very exclusive, — They say that at the watering places he is the cen- ter of admiratien of the tiret cirel Mr. C.—* That is literally true. He rans the best merry-go-round on Coney Jeland.” Self-Denial. Brother Shinflint, kaving heard a rousing sermon on the virtue of self-denial and another rousing sermon on the pl e which must necessurily fill the heart of him who contributes lilenilly tothe maintenance of the rch, has been so. seriou rouse by these sermons that he, as often as th ol sabbath comes around, regularly de- <himself the pleasure of putting the long (nickel into the contribution box; but makes it a simple penny instead, comicbooks.com