Judge — May 30, 1885 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Hear the siddy ¢ Beaming Lelles What sight of loveline coming eer f How they chatter, chatter, chatter, On the streets and aven ae, While the ribbons o'er th Hues of pink, and red, Keepi ime, time, In a sort of rai To the brilliant conve From the ni seatter and blue ne hyn ion that melodiously wells swells, swells, swells, swells, swel swells, swells, From the beatific, scientitic swells! A Definition. “What is the difference between an acci- nd a surprise asked Mrs. Spelterat break fast. All accidents are surprises, but not all surprises are accidents.” replied S. If I were to tip over the lamp, it would be an ac- cident. ay nothing about it, it wou “Tse,” said Mr ly. “And if you were to from the club sober, would that be both an a surprise? “No, my dear; that would not be an dent. It would only be an incident.” An Elevating Suggestion, Wny does not Mr. Mackaye devise an elevator for raising the players and phernalia of faro—alliteratiou included—out sight when the police raid the pla ‘The machinery might get out of action by long disuse, but that could be obviated by an understanding that the police should raid oftener and keep up show of vigilanc By telephone comunication with police he quarters, harmonious, vigorous and effective co-operation could be secured, the public be pleased and no one hurt. vident and a | Their melody fore How they Jaugle, jing . a Thro’ the air to waiting ex, With a bin; They are calling Keepin; time, In a com! To the coming of the hut To the smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, sm To the savory and Hear the taj cene of luxury te'er foretell! n cir uve How they tiv From the mori While the With a chime, in a rackin, 1 the rattling that sy train, Assassinated Again. Losnox, April 25 — Advis he Chinese Viceroy of Yui onderi ventsand the ki forei:mers. Several of the condemned Po been razed several hundred vertsand foreigners had already been China say that anand Kwechong lad action @f all all Catholic e short cablegram, published in rs, for the last tin ashudder to run thro ybody except those familia f the foreign bureaus of 1 P flices. ‘These experienced fi Know that the Cathohies in Chi their usual state of health, and nite oblivious to the interesting fact that the had been again massacred, in the American newspapers. If we are to believe these enterprising journals, the Chinese C have been massacred again and again, until like the cel they rather relish being skinned. ‘The supply of Catholics in China is entire- ly inadequate to to the demands for massacre made upon them by American journalists, It was the custom to ma e them regu- larly every three months—in type—but of late the French war news from China has given them a respite. With the signing of the articles of pe: they come forward as gayly as a lamb to the shuighter. Ivis quite safe to slat p newspa 26th, enn veins of eve the method that the news of this China in me aps the slandered of Yunnan and Kwechong will think ry to fulfil what was told of him, we shall have a real massacre to it neee ind then k about. No doubt the Viceroy is a respectable old time, time, able rhymi y hore-car bells, gan-grin corner of the paper. ‘The news is nevercon- — | firmed, but the public are satistied, and that is the last of it. We hope that this ex- posure will consign the clectrotype to well rved oblivion, that the pious Chinese Cacholics may allowed to their lives without the necessity of being massacred so frequent: ly “to grace , American journal C. and M. There seems to be a fatal conjunction in these initis Tt is | Crowley and Ma “Tt was ( : Jand and Maria for- | merly. ‘This isa comn- cid 5 But th House for one 1 and the State for the other, a coincide contrast to their be smells, appetizing smells! int ers . Whi ar traint arodies nd Sheridan's aming of Bucephalu Rides, ete., ete. ator who inv bly votes in the the man who * her corns and her bunk And she'll love him the e; but she'll * shake" him forthwi ath is perfurned with Spring oni Rotts of Honor—Prize biscuits at the Cooking Club. the English will be Victoria-ous in either diplomacy or y un-Czar-tain question, }) Wretien over the f fightin ve No scept OG No stat No onator va od ki seral victorious “1 for bis worth, with jeweled crown, an bone Is half so proud, conceited, or Ber ki As he up such a pother who swaggers forth some day father Pphieal, probably. — hine—'The dentist’s patent CAN'T even sign my own name with a pen, but I'll now ’ right a few lines’, all the same,” as the uneducated fisherman said when he proceeded to unsnarl a lot of tackle. person who only concerns himself about the | cooking of his fried rats, and the compressing of his daughter's feet. ; People expect news from China now and then or they might think that it had slipped under Thibet and become lost. that the live journalist: brings out the cellu- loid electrotype of this hideous massacre, adjusts the dates, and prints it in an obscure Tt is then | I know not “Why the spirit of mortal should be proud,” I know not “Who struck Billy P T know not * Where the Hebrew children are not— tterson” in a crowd, ut this date oF care S'long’s Lean get my drinks * put on theslate.” comicbooks.com