Judge — February 3, 1883 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

TAMMANY’S LULLABY lather, whieh took n | pot stand, and, by doing the work myself, snve four _— Ttegun to lather my face 1 got too much on ia one | dollars easy enouh On, rock-a-bye, polities, Kelly's asleep (7 spot, and ao it ran down k to my collar, ant | [had the materials sent home, and after collecting h a then separate of whieh took the | together the necessary tools, took the kitehen for my Hut Grudy’s suave voice doth bid them away, sinside ro out at the bo y | work-shop (not, however, without remonstrance from eg (I think) making things rather chilly inside, | the cook) a t to work. First [ measured and wewake: while the other made a beeline across my new vest Fked up ds the shapes and sizes of the A whisp'ring—" Let Cleveland, pro fem, have his «ay wil left a white soap streak, which 1 removed in abont me f an to saw them out. 1 placed fully kickin’ andl sighin’ fifteen minutes by hard work. 1 was more earefal + bourd on a kitchen chair and, holding it down with eveland chose Shanahan ‘teal of Othe ext time, and so hai no ditticulty inh . wely,when suddenly Oh, mekea-bye oe, Tarmmna: Then 1 stropped my razor for nusaal, Upow Which is for the © non 4, Uninkineg that eae the: fai Now risen the query, « tact lea resale wl began to shave, TP bexan a Q afterwant aml the test thing 1 did was to ent a sl sort of a te about four est 10 And te ar jo mind, “The Lizard of the Hil ‘Tho' ousted by you, may “ enack " Tarmmany sti is, thought at the tin f complete that flower-pot This was somewhat ise t Vif Thad to saw the whole kiteben up into. kin: apider’sweb ont of the attic and soon stopped the wood — = Wow. thought it best this time to begin on my ehin, | After considerable work, Iaawed out all the pieces 0 sive the cut a chance to beal, and accordingly | without any farther mishap Uan to saw my thumta CONUNDRUMS. so, cutting that worthy member five times slightly | little. [thought now I bad the worst part of my jolv - 'y hairs by the roots hefore | over, and congratulated myself upon this as I began to uded that the razor was not sharp enough to | nail together the pieces. My congratulations, however. shave well with. L observ w stropy had a | came too soon, for the first stroke of the hammer miss- Wav cannot everyboly eat quail 2 hone on one side, and so [ sharpened up my razor | ed thenail head and struck my index floger-nail, al: How is your head 2 Were you at the French Ball Iv yes, has your wife found ye : thoroughly and U Teft cheek, (Now 1] moat disabling it for life and almost making me swear don't me n ch that was pretty | Twas fast getting desperate and went at the naila hard- Inually * left bu yposite—near the left ear). | er th FS y soon the hammer flew off the well, al zor | handle the cook in the pit of the stomach. Way Senator Kiernan has so much spare time? still pu anol Tent my ear very lightly, after | Great heavens! What 1 hall thought before to te Woat Edward Kearney does with his mc Wity Medoe Fox is said tobe worth $100,000 Wary come men ye from 12 4. te 1 which, by being exceedingly eareful, 1 mpests were to what followed this as showers Wny Senator Grady Is to be bounced from Tamm ting the wounded cheek shave pretty clea cyclone iain ? course [was late at breakfast ands sailed front and rear, and fled for safety into . fom my *“better-half, yamedd individual <-room, When [ at last mustered courage Semi i Gales CARS Nes LEONE TOF” al (or part) lanzhed at J me to kill my | to ge into the kitehen [found my stand broken int barber and get awothe | pita, and the cook gone—teft ve up the How much do the manufacturers of -sautrine pay | after Mr. Woloott t anail breakfast 1 walked down te my aftice and | job and paid a regular mechanie $7.40 to do it, Now the weather twing cold and [having forgotten to | Tam notin league with these mechantes, but give my Whes Counselor Jimmy Oliver will knock ont | pat hay-rum on iy face after shaving, my face | experienee in order that young men may learn better. Tommy Maher? chapped and became so ati that Leoukl not apen my | It is almost always wise and economical, when we Siri ever isda Ota hone Woriblas eaNTUICOaA: Hantil Phad sat over the efor half an | want anything to zo to the proper place and pay for the present one np and thaw * Learehully weighet the mat J of trying to make it ourselves. In the sive asain the ween Gt tanlannbwe eine in my mind aud then resolved up shavin: some wise old fellow long since gone to his self, ail took.any emp, razor, ete. back tothe bare | reward, AIL ® not gold that glitters ihe ber that very evening. Some t this my wife Howanp Zire. after fully describing the thing || Tux: Massachusetts Historical Society has disec Way Governor Cleveland does not diainiss more men ike M » ottice t Way some of the members of swell clubs are not in enter ancl foul n, where they beton: had planned, that it wonkl cost about seven dollars, | that Whittier's “Maud Mutler™ conkda't m b man who was as mu “ M1 found that Teoukd get eneush | worth a cent. This is probably the reason why the man nost ordinary newspaper repo A three dathare te baile the flower shook * her Iv Colonel Cunningham had thrashed Gebbard, would he not be entitled to the thanks of reporters every where ? All is not Gold that Glitters, Iy’s all well enough to make fun of tradesme: barbers, carpenters, ete., because sometimes they slo and say fanny things, and fanny men make these fanny things seem even funnier than they really are (fanny aint itt), We all love to laugh at a good joke, whether not; but I have made up my mind never fa barber or carpenter joke again, for I he professors to be most useful and convenient, and that they should be exempt from jest and joke, 1 have foand out by bitter experience that these mer not cruel monopolists and tyrants, and that if y want anything in the I ‘ pays to go to a good “artist” it ae Now, Lama man not heavily loaded with “1a and so Lam always very carefal to take good ailvier in regard to economy. A friend of mine tohl me time since that it was a ‘great deal nicer” to shave yourself, and that by # doing you could save consi able money in th ag Thad my bru or at the barber's, Lrvaulved to try the experimen: for myself, Accordingly I purchased a razor atrop for seventy-five nid soap for fifteen cents, and procerste, on forebreakfaat, to shave myself—an operation I had never before performed irat 1 tried to pat the cake of soap into th 1 that it waa too large, so I trimmed it off to fit with the razor, thinking that such soft stuffas soap © t possibly Wall it. | pried B A Chern Enid iesiBiaittlp Hoenanroee brush and began to make Fie ay Piven sel “tts ems comicbooks.com