Judge — December 9, 1882 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. PRECAUTION. Trvant (to bis Pst! Rules and Etiquette for Profes- sional Pall-bearers. yo THE SECRETARY OF PALL-REARERS’ CIATION OF New YORK. Proc uiare Ist. The old time castom of knocking off handles or name-plates from the {coffin and carrying them h for mementos of the happy oc: te. Any pall-bearer that is not satisied with the plaques of the defanct now distributed at all first class funerals, is 8 disgrace to the profession. 2. The regulation look of hitter woe must times be upon your count of grievous sorrow are not expected from yon; there- fore, sponges filled with salt water and concealed in handkerchiefs for supplying a foan altogether de troy the latter word will be found in the * manual.”) 3d. It is not considered the corn casket which contains the dear d up in the hearse, as some of the mourner over-partjcalar and make objections tc that sort. 4th. Plaid fronts, see-more coats, red neckti loid dickeys, and green ¢ prentorious (see page 93 of manual”), as a costume for pre handlers at interments. Sth. Section 99,201, of the Revised Rules and Rezu- lations for the season of 1882-3, lly. prohibits spitting on the hands and takin sh hold, when the cadaver is found to be unusually heavy, To p vide against such an emergency a porous plaster should be constantly worn upon the small of the back. 6th, Strikes will not be tolerated this year. If four of you contract to deliver a subject “right side up with care” at the cemetery for the regular tariff rates $8, gloves, crape and carriage—no kicking for a higher price at the church door will be allowed. Concerning the question of a distinctive hyma or anthem for our Order, it has been decided to leave it toa vote of the members, The two following aro snb- mitted, and you will please communicate your choi in writing, to the Secretary. The first is from the ready pen of the Sweet Singer of Michigan,” and can be sung to the air of “1 Johnny Dougherty the Tailor.” “Oh, we're noboy Metropolitan Pall-bearers We're men of great renown, And everybody knows when they torn up their toes, We're the best cadaver:bandiersin the town, ©. yes, we “take the cake ‘at all the funerais ‘And at the borial ground, For when anybody dies, this Is thetr fat ery: “Let Profesh'aals’ boss the service ail around” — | The second was handed in by the machine poet of | Tur Jepar, with meter and melody cut on the fit “ The Lackawanna Spooners.” Yes, here we are again—t cemetery *sooners.* AtjIngling with the * stiff," they say we are the boomers You bet it is the truth, we are the boss entombers, ‘We always take the chromo made bs Prang. On, we furnish all the subjects of the medical coltege. (Of which the morning friends have no knowledge) On the dissecting-tabies there never is a stoppage. For we're the soonest *soonera of the gang sion it now o at all nes, but audible outbursts and alabazonti might be playful act of ellu- oves are not en-regle oF im- ional sti aa to * Does de geogeraty fi (ie evidently expects a Th ow a the past year, and w tusiness for our Order th h ev Fraternally and funerially yours, Tur Den tol, ASH nol many Democrats who already have a policy . In fact. sooth, THe Jetir We read Ehnira, Bot why shouldn't Mark The con Mark Twain to pass the winte writing a book on the M expect to ‘on, writing a book on the xt tions would be atout equal, we shonld say Ose. of the glories of th Massachusetts, was and wonderfully c¢ of the Govern: late 1 his hair, which was ly. T wernor Andrew, « jamin’s glory is in his air alo Republiean friends onkeyings with out knows of a Lawrence? r infantry: A haby, we 3, has just mac ing two pounds five its appearance in New Jersey have known Jersey- the new arrival, In everything except weight w men amaller even t Be of coarse—he does! Why a vorac 1s man is lke a geist mill use ance, of cou TH ler's trust in Providence can be no further doubt about Governor Ben i He has just ordered his inauguration suit of clothes in that city Wi wild waves are saying about this time pep away from us, if ye Mornip taste: Somebody has een writing a letter to mething, and signing 8. W. eto it—at least that gentle This is the most extraordinary apecimen of that has ye other body ab It me under our observation. WanCK has been a arrested for tcher ming a sa serving of all sympathy him. It isd Rattavays are aristoc titutiona: They teac every man to know his station and to stop there, Some Fashion Notes. | An | swith bat hed-potato colored opera-cloak is trimmet ‘olored braid. gar-brown dress is n-harrel blue, of bonnet bas feathers shin; \ hast bepit cv vothing-iron gray is stamped y beads, brown bonnet yes are worn with ginger-snay Jilower warmed up with potato-colored plush el with poached ex: brown, he reid yellow, has a busted coal seuttle old: comicbooks.com