Judge — October 28, 1882 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Rules for Horseback Riding A RECENT number of a popular magazine contains an article purporting to giv ck riding, rkable for the it doesn't some hints on the artof ho particularly practical It doesn’t explain anything 1 valu which is rem amount of information in juestrian art, ave to remark that “the feet and a brain.” ‘This in- formation is timely. impart. the horse has four years many persons ler the erro! i feet have lab ‘ous impression that a horse had eight aml two brains But this is not so, unless he's twins of the two- headed girl pattern, ‘The writer, enough, neglected to state that tl has two cars and a tail—albeit, it: may merely a bob-tail, and a painful failure in fly- Th ine article ¢ the wise sug time. neludes with © mag: stion, that the best way tolearn 1 riding-school, at home, — But both of these plans have their objections: the and the second, expense and almost as much trout We have, therefore, prepar few portant rules which are warranted to go right tothe spot, or money refunded at the box- oft In horse's horseback riding is to go to orclse to have a good teacher first entailing trouble and expense mounting, always do so facing the head, otherwise you may be unde cided as to which way you want to go, un- less you amputate the animal's head and tail, and transpose the and this feat is difficult to perform without usly impairing the horse's health. Never wait for th kneel down, like a camel, in ord © readily. When you are in the saddle, take the reins left hand, and if the animal lowers his head and elevates his rear legs in sly reprehensible manner, retain your Some riders. slip horse to r to mount me in you hig seat—if of the and hold grip; but position i uncom. When the horse stands up on his hind legs and paws the air with his for don’t hastily slide down over his tail and r with him with a fence rail, Retain your sea hould the horse suddenly sl ct in the road, and stop with a pected rs tom you ca astride horse's neck im such an emergency, a death-like very a on to his mane with this fortable. t some ob- ming un- <, and you quickly glide over his ke ar This moc woisance don't alight on of dismounting the he your head culated to em and damage your hat Never stand on one le hor: the back , when riding through a town, in order on He is struck with THE JUDGE. And bets Lote nf fan, and the oferne nite pleasantiy= Jor To to impress tl belief that you perfo juvenile population with the fortylollar-a-week eirens le te tody for an escaped lunatic. ¢ balk, and nd dash off home fo unceremoniously seating you in the middle of ul that is, ner. ‘ou are lia be en into cu Should your hot become un- ag oats after highway, don't retain your seat ont retain it until the animal retur $ are that he will forget to come back. the tes around under the horse's abdomen follow it. One of the difficult in the world is to ride a horse with a firma, and your feet recklessly aiming at the glories of the Besides, it thing most your head pointing to te is not en regle, ant 1 horsemen. sensibly refrain from indulging in this style of equestrianism. Never attempt to retain. your the saddle by nervously grasping the hors hand and his tail with the other. Such an exhibition of horsen is apt to elicit rin one ansiiip unfavorable comment—and I fruit—from the street gamin. Sit don’t beat the horse's ribs with your knees as if you were playing on a double-barreled bassdrum et out of the saddl to the unknows erect, and nd don't bounce three as if you were reaching ble for the unat- tainable, When accompanied by a lady- who, by th wid be on another horse—you will somewhot abashed when your steed per- sists in stopping, the road. usual, atevery tavern on The proper thing to do in such an unpleasant predicament is to frankly ex tothe young lady that the horse formerly ngedl toa man who ran for a political was out weeks wh for office, and horseback riding clectionecring She's a very unreasonable woman if this explanation doesn't oust her suspicion Should ye ed with the jump a four-rail fence ¢ for the purpose of gather ing a bouquet of daisies, or browse among their fragrance, don’t accompany outrageous every day six on tours mes wsthetic craze, along the roadsir him. Such nonsense should 1 al in a beast as sensible as the horse. When a horse attempts to kick a fly off his ar with his hind foot, and nearly breaks your 1 the effort. don't scold him anil threaten ck his two eves 1 be encour: into one.” This is la gen v dollars and a half, and buy a tricycle. daw. saddle slips its cable and mi- | ly adopted, but a better | cheme would be to sell the horse for four- | Aud spo me, just as a matter of course, aid jot wish me to think she was bold, te And thus the acq Unul the breakers enfolded us two, We both we While th into the surf The waters #0 cool «lid doam Round th Mt purl My love both ripened For this red-stockinged 1 riper srew Tin Dreeehes of blue, Her fa riferons mines, And his ¢ fF was rich lar was stocked with cobwebs and wines. For all of her wealth I loved her not But F envied each wave its enfoldin; I told her one day, as we bathed That, s I was poor, of vices I'd nc She looked at me long with her ¥ And shook out her hair, to le And said Jimmy, Oa Till everythin > me you not swear urns bluest t the air And do you not smoke the most wretched cis: And spit on the stove in the cars? ©, can you stand there, and say you don't chew The blickest of plug, oF the dew, + big asa drummer's, do 1 you a filthy young bea F cheek is one has call nmy, don’t tell me you are withe And that you ai Here she stamp Through ah And . Jimmy, now what do you think t ask you to have a nice drink; * But you hate it, you To join papa dear in I'm afra For gin is the drink up in our neigh + So please go away + Thave heard of your kind; they die very young Or are sent up for robbing the bank, of are h Ti dance; Or is giving a glance . at your partner's lovin; ect to despi Ano.ber great vice you al Ah, Jimmy t 1 thy To a game of draw-poker I ght, when the dancing “ask you—just one “But, Jimmy, you've =I me: And gay, lab n you're too good; e-dah, do you eat any ach and into the ho as a pic Then she rushed up the b And Fim as po 1 church mouse, A SENSATION writer has a book in press en- titled, ‘One of a Thousand,” Just think of it! Nine hundred and ninety-nine more to follow! Weare informed that the comet may be seen with a naked eye. We hope it is other- appareled. NIGHT-DREAMS are the many-colored mental patch-work made from the spare ¢ Jone day's thought.--Unknown Liar, who never ate mince-pie and salad before retiring. pressure: pings of Si | hana CIAL. king the friendly comicbooks.com