Judge — October 28, 1882 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

New York and the Pharaohs. It rejoi the heart of THe June ] mon with the right and left ventri fellow-citizens, no doubt, to observe th York City is so rapidly becoming Egyptian- ized. We have been blessed not only by an Obelisk (thanks to the boundle Mr. William HL. Vanderbilt and ism of Licute! of late have markable relic of old Nilu: ‘The former stands in Centr joy celebra 2, in com sof his | it New charity of lant he ant-Commander Gorrt aquired another even more re: | Sphinx! | wk: to the dir thing | but forev clors our somewhat pn derful Metropolitan Museum of Art; the latter sits (all day long, eating peanut ing riddles on small slips of paper) in Madi- son Square. It is difficult tosay whieh is t more curious or interesting; but the appears to attract a rather I boys than his rival in tl name of the Obelisk is report thority of the learned Comn (who, by the way, is in poss inal baptismal ers), to have been patra Needle (or Noodle—for early appear to differ on the subject), while the x is positively known to be Train, who has not spoken ed and truly und answer- phiny cer crowd of Park, ‘The ion th ander Gi ion of the ori Cleo storians name of the Sphi Ge F since —wh Happy, proud, imperial New York—with tivo such monumental monstrosities! If no ver lost their liberties who had a waterfall two hundred feet be the future grandeur of the olis which boasts of not only an Obelisk—but ancis people phinx! Este perpetua in eternum!! FABLES. A tong way after the Assyrian, and quite af from the Greek, BY JOUN BLACKBEIDOR, provided hin ¢ and commodious place of rendezvous, styled by his enemies a Hole, and by I | Mict with Louisville and Nashville, | Swered by a porium—for such, alas ! de. ‘The t and amiably at correspondents, and the Ink isly denied himself to de otlicers in the $ veupine v a home to law-writers, vi tributor kes o inporium from a brief visit to the Tarif Commission, before whom be had eloquently prohibitory duty on foreign quills, > found a Snake sitting motion- of the Hole devoted to alvation Army turnin and Su all grades. mie day to urged the Poreupir less in the corne Samples. Wha the Porcupine, to which the Snake replied : “Hearing that you had gota soft thing asa Stationcr, | have come here to be which I succeed perfectly, not | moved a mu: nee you entered. : will you,” replied the fretful Pore as he impaled the intruder with a brand-new quill, and hung him up in the Sample Depart. tionery, in ment forever. Moral.—This fable teaches that there still hoy r those who have hitherto made it doest thou here 2?” eried | THE JUDGE. ual attempts to get hung up in Sample coms, Be wise like the Serpent, and study his method, PLewner w « devastations the of the Public had b nt and 2 dimensions during a series of pro- of 1 in , one day in a moment of enthusi- ula Dill of ve i t Capitalist for hin point of f Lever heen Jered. ist, who had just eme from ct no such s ‘The Capital. tough con- fused to Tim in the Counsel an- neral Der dl demanded a Bill of Particulars. ‘The Plumber and his lawyer then absented themselves from society and produced a Bill of Particulars that wher it was unrolled in ¢ murt Hou four or five Commereial Fir Th al proved to be several times larger «the Court cent. for unfortunate Cap: mbulance to Let Amer- <° Bills ats pay, whereupon the Plumber su Supreme Court, Defendant's cuit, , the other end of it bankrupted doing business at the Bowling Green, Sum ‘Te than the added an allowance ntiit’s Counsel. L was r Poor-House he was heard to say: * this be a warning to the Solid Men of iea, always to pay Plumb without calling for Bills of Particula if they have to borrow the money of Rus se to do it.” Moral, amount fi original borne a good to be plumb; but better A MAN who stands the hava ‘The buyer of silk goods. rd of the dye: Mitiray order inapplicable to Ben Butler: “Eyes right.” “There is No Place Like Home Hints to Country Editors. ‘ow is the time to enk: Instance the W undred-thousand yon the thered tern farmer with wheattield, ‘Tell us again how corn is used for fuel in m Put up the ing in size lis! ue cre ny sections of the country, mnual prize pumpkin, approxins dome of the Capitol at Washington. mains of animals of un Discove th more tke r manun yew our old and familiar with the wonderful acquaintance serpent. Enlighten us on the of Captain jate th Iventures smtit ordinary encou with wind) and Trot out ( Washington's body s and give him an- other burial, Dig up the oldest inhabitant and record his kitest obervations, Wizard” Ei the world with electricity, the latter end of the largest eason. Forget not titty turkey Southern gradually, turning white, quest for Char ing of A. 1 or two « prop sings wave. orvan Interview subject of light. Take hold ¢ snake the Hon of the the one hundred and pound gobbler. Mention the negro who gradually, very Recommence the , likewise for the tind. body. Drop in a line sof Grant and the mpire, Inquire a little further into the authorship of the Morey Letter. and the guano busin Judge Hilton that debarring 4 hotel commodations docsn’t pay in the long run, Unearth the latest giant skeleton. mine and reveal all the wonders of Reintroduce the Keely Motor, andl de Give us a pinch of Blaine Rewind Ws from ae Go down ina ec the univer nnpanying dis us as to th s of artificial ¢ mond manufacturing, And finally, and all, do not fail to report: progress on the dis- puted authorship of autiful Snow,” comicbooks.com