Judge — September 30, 1882 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

POPULAR SONGS TL “Poor, aged yrandyn Vacation Vagaries. daly V.—e One mn role of “Gentleman of Leisure,” to ed for two consecutive weeks, T must Where will 1 go? e—that is, as re- Hlere 1 tion is about du enough. nth from today [sh sume th be pla » for it instante the cheapest p . fodder, and fun? am, x clerk—which is as much as to say T haven't any spare casl money, faster than it © <pri ; now I'm broke, on the threshold of a ter Guess 1 Spent all my in, on winter and Tam and her : w 1 drop lunches. this spre done? and newspapers, and new and—no, hang 1 must take to Coney. Ab! UT take her when I Tet me see—I won't buy th low shoes. There's $6 saved tor the Fresh- air Fund! Gad! [ll have an immense time! Kut where is the cheap country place? Listen to this vow: I'll only spend the price of my hoard, my fare to and from, and $4 for ine dentals, Not another red cent, s'help me Hold on! let me ponder. <, $2 for i dentals will do, Of course. Why, how ¢ I sperd money in thecountry? I'll keep away from the girls; I'll be mean, and not set up for the boys. Six dollars per week for two $4 fare to and from somewhere ; tals; total, $18. Why, a poorer 1 could afford such a sum, I'll an immense time! But where is this Ah, the Herald, Here goes for letters to Hiram Madd, Zachariah Over- alixand Co. There, chawbacons! if you want a swell young gent from city to loll around your piazzas, “mash” your daughters and unding (female) neighborhood, club our fruit trees and meander through your at fields, show there's time in your farm month, and drinks, pek-tie: Mary Y $2 incidk man than ha cheap place? in fence battle fe tell you (in pri w York “tiger,” dres cure off for jt dollars per wei ¢) yarns about like a fashion-plate holiday—I say, if p k may secure me. ‘on want send your che Six per week and meet-me-atdepot-with will book me by first return mail, Tuly —Well, I've received the answers, ound the high price of provisions, it must ‘have raised board all over the country Mudd will take me for $7, Overalls (ve , L now learn) taxes $10. These pric include milk, eges, butter, vegetables, meat, bread, alt, pepper, and other farm products, so needful to city people when the country. One old Waybackian nted $15, T have had his letter mounted and framed. It is now hung in the Finth Avenue Hotel, and any one disputing a bill at that establishin ctfully asked to peruse it, 3 if I tell you. | I've engages Overalls’. What’ | $10 a wi I learn there are two supertine girls there. 2 A fellow must be allowed a good time on vacation; likewise you have to pay for good times in this world, at least Ido. [might remark here that the pay question is what makes a future life seem so attractive to me. You are con- tinually told that ‘‘we will have a good time there;” but never, to my knowledge, has it heen stated that there will be any charge for same. By the way, my excursion ticket will be $9.13. I know this is more than I caleu- lated to pay; but I've got to get there, and I "t walk, can 1? ! I do hope Overalls will furnish a free buckboard ride to and from | the dep-po. Have saved up a little money during the past fortnight. Think I'll borrow some about July 31. water, in wa Found 1 bad to buy a vacation outtit: y shirt, fishing tackle, et Don't know just what same cost, Cau make a rough culation in my head up to ten dollars. however, t nal pen and would show a + ele, per memo. Well! Here I go out of the office with a load | that would paralyze a hotel port “Oh, I don't know. » much of'a time, now: that p me, Send any letters care back Junetion.” And. say I won't know how er outlay. * Don't | expect to it | is actually befor pralls, write a fellow, will you ? | to kill time up there. dug. 7.—Been here a week now. Oh, dear! Only eight—count ‘em—eight more days. First day after arrival [ did nothing but sit around, read the paper, wonder if t the next meal, and Thought the other board- contoundedly stuck up, elevated. set. But that all wore away. Tam not lonesome now. [have a morning girl, an afternoon nevening girl. Also other girls to be | attended to as time of 1 with Overalls’ daughter, Got in with the young lady boarders. Then tried the suri uintry. Kuow them all | now. Five have promised to write to me. What was that * How more quantity r dligcnitie Commene then launched out, unding ¢ you asked ? about V. Hugo ‘ould do justice Lo the black state of my mind, im despair, inky despondeney, ete., ete, Have been spending five to seven dollars a Who cares? Every one up here thinks t deal of me, aud I don't want to blight Il this regard by 1 tive hours to wind up all my se Will have to work mighty s will be on T now have ial rs. p. 'Fraid it 1 cold evening for the last girl on the ack to the city to-morrow of tongue or Faber, ¢ «pent—L now must labor.” .— Chaos. 0, —Have nittive boxes of candy to Money, money, money! I think, by avoiding evervthing but the bare neces- sities of life for the next three months, [ can “get even” Faken as a whole, my vacation proved rather expensive; but—I did have immense time, and that covers a multitude of sins. THAT was a fine hit of Governe neral Drentin, who vised Jews to give their country a little of the inordinate love they lavish on mon The Jew does not natu- rally love the country he lives in, but only what it gives to him. ‘The patriot Ameri- | can, Irishman, Frenchman, or German loves his country even when it gives kim nothing. ALTHOUGH the majority of single-scull race- boats are by no means “old tubs,” yet they have one thing at least which every old tub is pretty certain of containing, viz., a ‘‘ wash- board, Why does General Grant sometimes feel like the original Ten Commandments on the two tables of stone? Because he is ‘‘all broke uw) comicbooks.com