Judge — September 9, 1882 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

for a theater ticket, and they brag over it, Kut this is only a beginning, “ You astonish me.” “Why, the bill-boarders are enough to fill your house ten nights ina week. Barbers, of vurse; they hang up the playbills and litho: xraphs in their shops, and, while lathering customers, they can recommend or damn the play. So we are free to all barbe: pente! | for us, and } slone so, or say the; » Druggists? Why cerUnly. up our lithographs be- nd blue lights, do . wlsdealers? Ishouldsmile, Weoften ilks, ete., ¢ r . when we are starting a new pl Engravers? All the lithographers, of faney how they could distort our artists’ and costumes if we should offend them, ‘Then over two thousand liquor saloon comphiment- aries a month counts up, 1 can assure you, If they didn't get the complimentaries they wouldw’t display our playbills. We have got | the bulge on the legal profession, however; | no complimentaries for them except, when we happen to be in court, we tip our own attor- | neys, All the judges are regular first-nighters, | all the same, We tried te line at THE FASMIONABLE “CLIP” plumbers, but it failed to we Dighy decides to have his hair cul ala Sing Sing. “How was that 7” “We refused a plumber a pass. He said The Deleterious Dead-head. ason they rung in the carriers on us! ‘Then | Nothing, but 1 saw a sardonic smile creep over y| his face ashe went away, and I was sorry I all the surplus of the ‘perfesh’ that . on barnstorming routes, and this is a big | had said no, for f dreaded the animus of that I stoop, the other evening, in the fo crowd, especially when you add in the cos- | Smile, That night our cascade seene was a the Empyrean Theater, leaning on the ra tumers, the clocutionists, the dramatic agents, | Collapse—no water. The outlaw of the Sierras with the manager. People were taking seats | aud every man and girl that has ever hired | had to jump a dry ravine of practicable can- in crowds. ‘Good house again,” said 1, | asa supe, ‘Then all the authors, and amateur | vas, and when the Rose of Tuolumne, coming “as usual, old fellow. You're in luck; and | managers, and busted manag ‘The woods | in from a three-lays’ march over the dus| when the nights grow a bit cooler, you'll hang | are full of ‘em, There are more than five | alkali plains, exclaimed: “Thank God, I hear out ‘Standing room only.’ But how is it that | hundred Sydney Rosenfields and one thousand | the music of a running brook, I'm saved—I'm with such big houses your notes all the while | Chandos Fultons in this city, by actual count. | saved!" the audience snickei dl began to grow bigger, and more of’em? Last fall I) ‘Then comes the gang of pure and simple } guy the imaginative Rose. I rushed down- held $4,000 of ‘em, and now I've got $9,000. | first-nighters, headed by Uncle Bix Danby. | stairs, and examined the pipes. plumb. ‘The Gail Hamilton Bank is beginning to look | They always appear in full dress suits, with | ¢r had got down there somehow, and flattened shy at your signature, The cashier says, | big oper; entrance on | Out two fect of lead pipe against the wall, so BY JONN BLACKBRIDGE. ‘Anything, Mr. Blackbridge, to oblige a good pneral customer, but aren't you getting an overplus | “You know me, of the Empyrean not he bank must limit | Uncle Bix; ‘T haven't your line of this signature.’ And I don’t | missed a first’ night know how it will suit you tocurtail. Swelling | performance in from 4 to 9 don't look very flattering for cur- | twenty years, and no tailment.” manag. “It's the infernal system that does it,” re- | pute h ver refused ml the manager. ‘The d—d deleteri- | me. Damme, , detrimental-—deceptive—everything else | free of her Majesty with a big D—Deat-headism, that fills my | Opera, and would you theater every night, and leaves my treasurer | deny me an orchestra with hardly enough to pay gas bills. Look | chair, well forward, at it. Eight hundred people in the house to- | and in thecenter? I night, if one, and perhaps a couple of huu- | make reputations, I dred dollars to show for it. The rest. mold opinions at the “Well, what Low Toss Club; if we “ Dead-heads, and some of them the worst damn your play there, class—the first-nighter: sir, you may as well “Ts it possible?” | close your doors.’ “Yes, let me tell you first about the first- | And in goes Uncle nighters. They count right up into the thou- | Bix Danby, and a sands, Every newspaper man and woman in | hundred more like town, of se, with straini eof w of course, with strainings from Brooklyn | him, not one of Whom yo. 9. sraving had Ais hair clipped, he is returning quietly home when a rough attacks and Jersey City. This takes in contributors, | has in ten or twenty Aim, Digby remcoee his hat, the rough flies in terror mustaking him for Stim Jim the compositors, pressmen, office clerks, and last | years paid one dollar NR. Dighy can't fight reorth a cent, of any re- comicbooks.com