Judge — December 10, 1881 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE. LESSON. i OLD GrxTLEMAN TH Youse Wire (fonilly).—* My anything that takes your fancy, select it. | ‘mind the expense.” OLD Heswaxp (siz months lat Another one of these enormous bills of my wi T wouldn't object if I was allowed to enjoy her so~ | ciety a little more, b A New Industry. NYTHING in my line to-day?” ‘The speaker was a quick, wiry little man who bad slipped quietly into the sanctum and seated himself at the editorial elbow. “What is your line?” “Tam selling mummies by sample.” “Never heard of such a thing.” “Of course not,” chuckled the stranger. “ Nobody else ever did. It’s an original ide: of my own, Y. mummies is running out rapidly, owing to the unprecedented demand for them in England for fertilizing purposes and to grind up into paint.” Jrind into paint 2” Yes; they grind the blondes into yellow paint, while the brunettes are worked over into various shades of brown. Shade of Pha- raoh! to what base uses, ete. But we can't help that. Now it occurred to me that the total annihilation of mummies was threatened, some people might be willing to pay for speci- men copies to keep as curiosities, and I made arrangements to supply them. See? “Capital idea.” “T thought it nish, direct from Thet Tam prepared to fur- kings, queens —" Well, I don’t know whether they embalmed Jacks or not, but if they did, and family predi- lection leads you in that direction, I can get you one, sure.” , the supply of Egyptian | innuendo. Pharaohs are in greatest demand, the name is best known tothe general They were given a wide reputation, you remember, by the one who was drowned in the Red Sea while pursuing the Israclites. | We have the original Pharaoh, colored to a deep red by the action of the waters of the Red Sea, in whieh the body lay for some time before it was dragged out by the coroner.” “T don't c the editor; ¢ to invest in Pharaoh,” s the game is too uncertain. would like a Thothmes, or a were Egyptian kin they don't come so high. I can sell you a very good Rameses, wrapped in papyrus, on which is inscribed the method of playing pedro at the time the great pyramid was built, for a dollar and a half.” “No place to put it.” . Perhaps you Ra Th “It won't take up much room. In my sample case, which I left at the hotel, I have the check of an Egyptian reporter, which compares favorably with the American variety of the present day, though inferior in ada- mantine inflexibility. But you have no necd ofthat. I'll bring up my samples this after- noon, if you say so, and you can select any- thing that suits you.” « Don't troubie urself.” | “No trouble whatever to show goods. In cousin of hers. “Proceed,” said the editor, not noticing the | | THE GRADUATE. Why, there she gors again, reith that handsome young Ah, [must get a dog-cart next.” stian poet, the other day, I found some lyphies on the inside, which, on being deciphered, proved to be the original draft of the poem beginning, “Oh, the snow. ‘The beautifal—” ne editor made a quick motion towards a printer’s mallet lying near, and the mummy vender scooted for the door.—Cincinnati Saturday Night. A Fact.—Dr. D. has a bright little girl about four years of age, who is very fond of dolls, and he buys a new one for her near every day. He brought her a new one the other evening, but it did not appear to take her fancy at all. “What, don’t you like the nice new doll?” he asked, after ching her a few moments. “No; I's tired of stuff dolls; I want a real meat baby," she replied, earnestly. ‘THERE is nothing like leather.”. from the For a rousing guess you are right. wamp. A New York lady was recently overheard to say that she intended going abroad to place her daughter in a musical observatory. ‘Tur author of “Oh, for a Lodge,” ete., not | unwinding the papyri from the mummy of an | infrequently owed for his lodging: books.com