Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, May 1922 · page 22 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #33 — page 22: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains no cartoons—it's purely text: two sections of satirical aphorisms and a tribute poem. **"Wisest He"** reprints a Joaquin Miller poem honoring Peter Cooper, a 19th-century philanthropist. The poem's central message: true wisdom lies in *giving away* wealth rather than hoarding it—a gentle critique of materialism. **"Philosophy of the Bat"** offers six brief satirical observations on modern life (circa 1920s): - Men lead double lives; women adopt fashions casually - Doctors spread gossip - Women are natural investigators - Economic chaos (bank robbery, income tax, Bolshevism) makes spending money safer than saving it - A crude sexual joke about women saying "prunes" to signal romantic interest The "Bolsheviki" reference reflects post-WWI American anxiety about communism. The income tax jab targets 1920s tax burden complaints. These cynical one-liners typify *Whiz Bang's* humorous, worldly-wise tone for adult male readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
20 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang Wisest He The lines quoted under the caption, “Wisest He,” are from the pen of the late Joaquin Miller. The poem is in the nature of a tribute to Peter Cooper, philanthropist and humanitarian of earlier days. Honor and glory forever more To this good man gone to rest; Peace on the dim Plutonian shore; Rest in the land of the blest. I reckon him greater than any man That ever drew sword in war; Nobler, better than king or khan, Better, wiser by far. Aye, wisest he in this whole wide land Of hoarding till bent and gray; For all you can hold in your cold, dead hand Is what you have given away. * * * Filosophy of the Bat Men take to a double life like women do to a kimona. * * * The doctor is the perambulator of bedside gossip. * * * Women are the only real detectives outside the profession. * * * What with bank robbers, income taxes and the bolsheviki, the only way to keep your money is to spend it. * * * Even a deaf and dumb girl can say “prunes” when she wants to be kissed.