Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, April 1922 · page 10 of 67
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #32 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Captain Billy's Whiz Bang* (a humor magazine) contains a poem satirizing impossible expectations placed on women in the 1920s. The poem, retitled from "Naughty—But Nice," mocks the contradictory demands of the era: women were expected to be simultaneously modern and respectable. The verse catalogs contemporary "scandalous" behaviors—smoking, drinking (silver flask), wearing makeup, dancing the shimmy, parking unchaperoned, breaking social rules—while maintaining virginal virtue. The repeated refrain "I want to be naughty, but I want to be nice" highlights the absurdity of this contradiction. The title "It Can't Be Done" is the magazine's sarcastic editorial comment: society's conflicting demands on female behavior are genuinely impossible to satisfy. The satire targets both the restrictive social codes and the hypocrisy of those enforcing them during the sexually liberated Jazz Age.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
8 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang a comfortable nap on his downy bed. When the gobs are awakened from the chill and find their blankets missing they immediately search for Bruin. Would you believe it, that bear won't let any jackie take his bedding until he first smells him and then sniffs at the pile of blan- kets? When he finds the rightful owner he pulls out his blanket from the pile and gives it to him." Woof! Woof! Woof! * * * A New York poet who knows the yearnings of a demi- virgin's heart gave this verse the title "Naughty—But Nice," a plagiarized version of an original poem under that title which was published in an early issue of the Whiz Bang and the Whiz Bang Winter Annual. The New York Times, in publishing this verse, believes a more fitting title would be: It Can't Be Done I want to be naughty, but I want to be nice, I don't mind the route, but I don't like the price. I want to do what the other girls do— Tease 'em, and cuddle up, and bill and coo. Blacken my eyes, and powder my nose; Roll my cigarettes and my hose; Rouge my cheek and pencil my lip; Carry a silver flask on my hip; Tango a little, and shimmy a lot; Park my corset when the weather gets hot. Ride and swim and golf and skate; Take the fences instead of the gate. Break all records—yes, all but one— And be good and true when the game is done. I don't like pepper, but I do love spice; I want to be naughty, but I want to be nice.