Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, February 1922 · page 46 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #30 — page 46: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three literary pieces and a brief joke: **"Captain Billy's Whiz Bang"** (title): A tragic poem about a woman's suicide—she dies by dagger, having "loved—and fell" (suggesting seduction/lost virtue), a melodramatic Victorian moral tale. **"To a Mountain Rat"** by Frank B. Lindeman: A dialect poem personifying a rat as an example of God's imperfection, depicting it as naturally thievish and cunning. The humor lies in mock-serious theological complaint about a minor pest. **John Barleycorn reference**: An obituary-style tribute to alcohol (Barleycorn being a traditional personification of liquor), likely written during Prohibition (1920-1933), nostalgically mourning whiskey with dark humor about loyalty "til the last drop." **Final joke**: A pun on "excavation"—Pretty asks Witty's opinion of digging work for a new theater downtown; Witty replies it's "pretty good as a whole" (sounds like "as a hole"), treating excavation literally as a hole rather than construction work.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
44 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang God says, love one another, And down to the depths of Hell, Well he sent the soul of a woman, Because she loved—and fell. And so in the moon-light he found her, Or found her beautiful clay, Lifeless and pallid as marble, For the spirit had flown away. The farewell words she had written, She held to her cold white breast, And the buried blade of a dagger, Told how she had gone to rest. * * * To a Mountain Rat By Frank B. Lindeman. Yes I reckon God made ye He's blamed for rattlesnakes, And porcupines and woodchucks, And if they ain't mistakes Ye're a crowin' example Of carelessness divine, To nigh the danger line. Yer winkless eye in innocence Hides cunnin' cussedness, And yer skin is full to bustin' With a longin' to possess All things that don't belong to you, But when all's said and done There's things on earth ye've failed to steal, And reputation's one. * * * The real John Barleycorn of older days is gone, but not forgotten. Those of us who knew him best, and loved him most, Stuck with him 'til the last drop. * * * Pretty (looking over the new theatre down- town)—What do you think of the excavation? Witty—Oh, it's pretty good as a whole.