Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, February 1922 · page 38 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #30 — page 38: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Captain Billy's Whiz Bang* (a satirical magazine) contains political commentary and humorous notes: **Main Article**: The Chicago Tribune is praised for attacking "Mr. Crafts" and his movement, described as bigoted and savage, motivated by a desire to jail fellow citizens and destabilize the republic. (Likely refers to Anthony Comstock or a similar moral reform crusader of the early 20th century, though the specific figure isn't named here.) **"Farmyard Notes"**: A series of rustic one-liners and puns (chickens toughening up, cauliflower superiority, bird/berry reversals). One joke about cross-eyed men ogling women in short skirts reflects the era's anxiety about changing women's fashion and sexual morality. **"Cellar Ancestry"**: A whimsical poem personifying vegetables mourning vinegar's "mother's" death—pure nonsense humor typical of the magazine's style. The page mixes genuine political critique with lowbrow humor, characteristic of *Whiz Bang's* irreverent tone.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
36 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang BULLY for the Chicago Tribune. That journal slips the prong into Bluenose Crafts in a recent issue: It is beginning to appear that the movement led by Mr. Crafts is as bigoted and as savage in its purpose as those which we thought were buried in the semi-barbarous past. It must be held that no human uplift but maniacal desire to inflict physical punishment is the motive. Mr. Crafts and his followers wish to put as many of their fellow countrymen as possible in jail, and they are trying to wreck this republic in order to do so. * * * Farmyard Notes Chickens get tough when they run around too much. * * * Be it ever so humble, there's no flower like the cauli. * * * A bird in the oven is worth two in the bush and a berry in the bush is not worth two in the hand. * * * I wish I was cross-eyed, then I could stand on a windy day and gaze at a lady wearing a short skirt, right in the eye and still have a guilty conscience. * * * Cellar Ancestry The potatoes eyes were full of tears, And the cabbage hung its head, For there was grief in the cellar that nite, For the vinegar's mother was dead. * * * You can lead a cow to water but the Bull—he must be herd.