Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, March 1921 · page 54 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #18 — page 54: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page collects humorous fake classified ads and notices reprinted from various newspapers. Each item uses absurd or unintended double meanings to create comedy: **"Getting Rid of Grandma"** plays on dark humor about elderly relatives, using "butchering hags" (elderly women) as if it were a literal service. **"Objection Sustained?"** satirizes a governess job listing that explicitly rejects attractive, accomplished women—implying the father's infidelity risk. **"Arise, Ye Dead, and Walk"** mocks a mausoleum advertisement's awkwardly phrased invitation. **"They Feel Nice on Your Cheek"** exploits suggestive language in satin bloomers advertising. **"All Soldiers Invited"** likely jokes about bean suppers' notorious digestive effects on soldiers. The humor relies on misreadings, euphemism, and innuendo. This format—reprinting real classified ads with absurd interpretations—was typical satire in *Captain Billy's Whiz Bang*, a bawdy humor magazine popular in the 1920s-30s.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
52 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang Classified Ads Getting Rid of Grandma (From the Mount Horeb, Wis., Times.) Krohen Bros. have been doing a land-office business butchering hags for individual families in town. * * * Objection Sustained? (From the Clarendon (Eng.) Mercury.) WANTED—A really plain but experienced and efficient gov- erness for three girls, eldest 10. Music, French and Latin required. Brilliancy of conversation, fascination of manner, and symmetry of form objected to, as the father is much at home, and there are grown-up sons. * * * Arise, Ye Dead, and Walk (Sign in Seattle Street Car.) The beautiful mausoleum at Washelli cemetery affords a royal resting place for those that sleep in death. For directions to get there, phone Ballard 1850. * * * They Feel Nice on Your Cheek (Advertisement in Indianapolis Star.) Oh, so warm! Ankle length satin bloomers, with the prettiest shirred cuff. It's the quality of soft satin you like to feel against your cheek. * * * All Soldiers Invited (From Keene, N. H., Democrat.) There will be a bean supper, at the First Unitarian Church, on Saturday night, followed by a musical programme.