Puck — May 21, 1879 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

170 PUCK. MRS. VICTORIA’S BIRTHDAY. 'HE thirteenth regiment of Brooklyn, ac- companied by Chaplain Beecher, is go- ing to Canada in a day or two for the purpose of participating in the festivities to be piven on the 24th May, Mrs. Queen Victoria’s irthday, a sort of national holiday for loyal Canadians; Now Puck is rather inclined to encourage the proposed friendly expedition. It will be a nice picnic for the boys—will give Chaplain Beecher an airing, and show our Canadian brothers that we Americans are not such a bad lot, after all. The regiment will be reviewed by Mr. Gov- ernor Lome and Mrs. Governess Lorne, who have had special low-necked garments made for the occasion by their respective tailors and dressmakers, Montreal will be gaily decorated, and will surrender itself to all manner of enjoy- ment. A holiday is always a good thing, even if there’ be but little reason for its observance; but why Canadians or any sensible Britishers should celebrate the birthday of Mrs. Victoria more than that of any other woman in the Kingdom or Dominion, we are at a loss to un- derstand. We are far ahead of England in the matter of national holidays. There are good grounds for remembering the 4th July and Washing- ton’s birthday, but there is absolutely not a single iota of sense in professing jollity and lightheartedness because another year has passed over the head of the exceedingly ordi- nary and peculiarly parsimonious old lady who, it is a pleasing fiction to suppose, rules Great Britain. How the English people can have remained so long without a regular national holiday on which to celebrate some event of which they might have reason to be proud, is indeed aston- ishing, We love good sturdy Old England, and shall therefore make no apology in offering a suggestion or two to fill the void, Why not make a day of rejoicing on the anniversary of the unwilling signature of Mr. King John to Magna Charta? Another appropriate day fora British national festival would be on the date of that little be- heading business in connection with another beautiful heroic character in English history —we refer to the late Mr. Charles the First. We think this exceedingly desirable operation took place on the 3oth of January. Enthusiastic lovers of the Stuart family—not A. T. S.—of the English Established Church, for many years after the event used to go to church and pray for the poor martyred king. What a splendid idea, then, for the English people to revive its observance—but to observe it as a jubilee, in- stead-of with weeping, wailing and prayer. But there will be yet a better day to keep than Mrs, Victoria's birthday. And that is when the whole of the exceed- ingly prolific and noble Brunswick family retire into private life or seek some other part of the globe, other than England, where they can still manage to be fruitful and multiply and replen- ish the earth without such extravagant salaries. They always get along well enough in this line, and perhaps this is the reason they are not so strong on the cultivation of intellect and good manners. THE THEATRES. The Colored Pinafore Co. has returned to private life and Thompson St. Mr, A. M. Palmer has closed a highly successful season, with the exception of the little Cauzauranic caper at the end, and has handed over his theatré to the Rice's Surprise Party. New York will please prepare to be surprised. At Wattacr's the Nursery Pinafore is sail- ing along smoothly. There was some slight trouble one day last week when the Midship- smite fell into a crack in the floor and was lost for an hour or two; but the Captain dived for him and brought him up all right. Miss Ada Cavendish’s Rosalind calls for future notice. At present it need only be said that it is quite the Correct Kibosh in the line of Rosalinds, Mrs, Fanny Foster, assisted by Miss Clemen- tine Lasar and Mr. Frederic Clark, gave a charming entertainment on Friday night, at Chickering Hall. Mrs. Foster won the hearts and the piaudits and spoiled the kid gloves of a large audience. She is a graceful elocution- ist, and past-mistress of several styles of humor. Miss Clementine Lasar is a good soprano, and the one redeeming feature about the Reverend H. W. Beecher’s church, Haverly’s Pinafore in peto is filling the Lyceum, which is more than Mr, Edwin Booth has ever been able to do. This may be partly because Mr. Edwin Booth does not play in Pinafore, and partly because he really has not as much natural dramatic feeling and enthusiasm as some of Mr. Haverly’s wee kids. It is much easier to do a conventional Ham/ef than to in- terpret Gilbert and Sullivan to the satisfaction of trained Pinafore audiences. “Fatinitza” flourishes gloriously at the Firru Avenue. The improvement since the opening night is remarkable, and the performance flows as smoothly as the Danube River, on the banks of which the first scene is laid. We do not like to lay on praise with a trowel, but, at the risk of having such a charge laid at‘our doors, we say it, and say it boldly, that no better re- presentation of any work of the kind has ever been given in this city, We congratulate Mr. Harkins, Messrs, Koster and Bial have transformed the old Dan Bryant's Opera House into a con- cert hall of large dimensions. The decora- tions are superb, and the orchestra of 25 musi- cians, led by Mr. Rudolf Bial, discourses sweet and lively music nightly to hundreds of beer- drinkers, New York sadly needed such a re- sort, which many European cities have for so many years considered indispensible to their existence. Messrs. Koster and Bial have cer- tainly supplied the article for which our souls yearned, with all the necessary trimmings, and without sparing any expense. Indeed the costly ornamentation betokens a lavish outlay, The Concert Hatt is always crowded, and promises to be so to the crack of doom. Answers for the Anrions, Hasevting.—She remains obdurate. HANNAH.—What is the matter with you? MILLICENT ANNABEL.—No, it is not quite the right thing for you to go out with two different young men to two different places at the same time. It might not look Proper. Irswicn, Jr.—We conclude, from a carefal perusal ot your MS. that that you are either a hatter by profession, or something in the March hare‘line. In either case, we have no use for you, RADIATE.—Please go somewhere else to radiate, Go to the Joshtown ab-7ad, or the Peory Peorian, They don’t mind that kind of thing. But we do, and we will show you how we mind it if you will favor us with a visit between 10 and 4 any day. G, Moser.—Thank you for the sketch, which you see we have made immortal in this week's issue. As to the letter—well, unfortunately, it happens to conflict with Puck's personal, private and particular policy, and so is not available. Nevertheless, accept our acknowledg- ments, and a gentle hint that we shall be happy to hear from you again. WHAT GOETH ON AT PRESENT, Now also last summer's straw hat is risen from the shot, and become the first-fruits of them that have not wherewith to purchase a new tile, And with the same is no one deceived; nay, rather shall derision be its portion and the con- tumely of men the lot of him who weareth it, And furthermore, at this time the festive coachmen appeareth at the front, inserteth an advertisement demanding service in a country villa, And therein he duly specineth whether the young maiden of the family shall be fair or dark, according to his taste. For unto this pass have things now come, But as in a vision the paternal boot-tip asserteth itself in the dim distance; and that coachman seeth it not. And in these days the vender passeth through the streets and crieth: “Strawberrees!” And the prudent housewife getteth out her micro- scope and examineth his stock, and saith unto that vender: ‘Behold, I will buy of thee those berries that are of the fifth and sixth magnitude; but them that exceed not the diameter of a pin- head I will not have, nay, not at ten cents a piece, nor even if thou comest down to eight.” Also now doth the young man who clerketh it in the dry-goods store begin to set aside she- kels of gold and silver, but mostly of silver. For he communeth with himself and saith: “This season will I swell it at Saratoga, and make the festive splurge in the eyes of the maidens at Long Branch.” And he accumu- lateth a pile, and he seeketh to double it at faro. And when Saturday night cometh, that young man seeketh to propitiate his land- lady by going into the back-parlor, where he woeth the daughter of the house; yea, the maiden with the mighty nose and the unspeak- able shoulder-blades; she who is cast out and rejected of the other male borders. And may these things avail him much! Selah! And at this season ariseth the man who is born and bred in the town, and whose horizon is Hoboken on the West and Gow- anus on the East, and who holdeth Harlem for the North Pole and Staten Island for the South. And he saith within himself: ‘Lo, now, these many years have I labored and taken no holiday, saving Sundays at Manhat- tan Beach. Now, therefore, will 1 go out into the country, and this time will I take my wife, and I will sojourn in the wilderness for a calen- + dar month, yea, even at Pamrapo or Lebanon Springs. And I will go forth in the morning and pluck the watermelon from the high trees, and seek the cucumber in the bushes of the wildwood, and strawberries will I cull from the vines, that clamber about the farmhouse porch, and much and variously will I disport myself in rural ways. Yea, verily!” And now are the men of the Society of Friends, even they whom the ungodly call Quakers, come to town, according to their custom. And they hold meetings wherein is there much silence, and edification, and some snoozing. For this is a people that holdeth its peace when it has nought to say. And therein doth it differ widely from the tribe of the poli- ticians and from them that advocate Tempe- rance for hire. But when the meeting is over, the young brother of a woridly mind, him that sat over against the women and exercised his eyelid after the fashion of the world’s children, taketh counsel with his chosen friend and oeth out and bummeth in secular and repre- Rensible ways, and walloweth in the fleshpots of Egypt, even unto the imbibing of the hila- rious and unholy sarsaparilla syrup, And when they are gone back to South Podunk, the friend of his bosom is moved of the spirit to confess the iniquity of the other youth, and that sin- ner is taken in hand by the brethren, and is disciplined and held up as a warning to them that stand in slippery places.