Puck — October 9, 1878 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

\e ~ Well? PUCK. -PUCK’S COMEDY-STORIES. Vibioe THE TRUFFLES. ‘Adapted from the French of Epovaxn Manrm™ and Ausert Mon- water by B. B. Vattentixe. (Coneluded.) BorEALL (seated on the sofa, and sniffing in the direction of the kitchen). Ah! how deliciously it smells. It is perfectly heavenly. , EpMuND (apart), + Now it is my turn. Boreatt. Edmund, it looks for all the world like an infant in its cradle. How you'll relish it. Ah, we'll relish it together. EpMunp (sifting next to him). Have you seen this album ? BorEatt. The album? (Aside) Lucy has told him. EpMunp (opens it and points to a portrait). Dé you know this gentleman? BoreaLt. A gentleman. (Aside) She hasn't told him. Not bad, ‘pon my soul. Epaunp. Do you recollect if you ever saw him? Boreatt (examining it), Wait a minute, wait a minute, Epaunp (rising). Boreae (rising). Whenever I see photographs, I always ima- gine that I know the faces, and then I find that I don’t. EpMunb. You are quite sure? BOREALL. Quite sure. EpMunp. Well, so much the better. BoREALL, Why so? Epaunp (drishiy). The world is full of disagreeable gossip. BoreEALu. And what can they find to say about this man in connection with me? I don’t know him—I never saw him. Epmunp. Oh, it has nothing to do with you, but with —with Mrs. Boreall. a BoREALL, Angelina? Epmunp. I may as well tell you at once that I don't believe a single word of what people say about the affair. . BorEALt, What do they say? EpMunp. A lady, seeing this portrait in our album, re- marked, ‘I'll wager it was Mrs. Boreall who sent you that.” She admired it immensely, and then began to laugh immoderately. Boreat, She’s a very amusing personage, no doubt. Epmunp. If what she said is true, it would be rather a funny thing. BoreEALt, Yes, it would be funny. EpMunp. Very funny—but not for you. Boreatt, What do you mean by “ not for me”? EpMunp. ‘ Because (Ae stops to laugh), my poor cousin —but with such a handsome face—stay—it was not right of me to repeat’ this conversation; say nothing more about it. BoreEALL, No. Please tell me all about it. 3 EpMunp, Then I should be a mischief-maker. Con- sider that I have said nothing. Let us go to dinner. BoreALu. Yes, to dinner. But still I should very much like to know. EpMuND. Why do you bother your head about it? BoreEALL. Well, because— Epmunp. The soup will get cold. Come to dinner. BOREALL. A minute doesn’t make much difference. I don’t like soup too hot. So they gossip about Mrs. Boreall, a woman thirty-six years of age? Epsunp. That is often a dangerous period. Boreal. A woman who has as much to look after as she has—to cook and attend to housework — can’t be dangerous. EpMunb. ‘That’s what I said. No, you can’t make me believe that Mrs. Boreall gets her husband out of the way to make the way clear for her lover. Boreat. But the portrait ? Epmunp. Just so. The busybodies say that it is that of that ridiculous hair-brained inventor—the countryman, you know. It is of course absurd; but it is on that account they believe it. Therefore you can afford to laugh. Why don’t you laugh ? Boreat (trying to laugh). I do laugh. Epmunp. I'm sure you're not jealous. Bore. Oh, dear, no; but I shall be very glad to have this thing explained. Where is my hat? Epaunp (keeping him back). What! after all I have said to you, you are still suspicious ? Boreay. Not exactly suspicious, but still I am_natu- rally concerned; but— Epmunp (holding him). Dinner’s ready—come, come. Borean, Give me a quarter of an hour; the time passes quickly. EpMunp. as dinner will be cold. Can’t you smell it —el Boreatt (sniffing). Yes, of course { do—that glorious turkey. Epaunp (pushing him by the shoulder towards the kitchen). And you would miss such a splendid feast ? Smell again. BorEALL. I smell it; besides you are right—there ought not to be such reports about. . EpMunp (still pushing him about). Now, once for all, take no notice of such things. Boreatt (completely dazed). I do despise them. I am satisfied. Epmunp (satanically). Quite right, even when the man is enjoying a téte-a-téte with your wife. BorEALt (ériskly). But that is if he is. EpMunb. Well spoken, old man. You are a philoso- pher. BoREALL. I should like to bea philosopher, but not a dupe. EpMunb. Oh, pshaw! BoREALL. I am going. EpMunp. Smell again. Bora. Much. obliged, but please don’t tempt me, I have a strange sort of feeling. I am in doubt. I don’t know exactly what todo. My conscience tells me to go home, Epmunp. And your stomach tells you to remain. BoreEALL. Yes, Epmunp. It isa fight between reason and appetite. Oblige me, cousin, and stay—a beautiful din- ner, excellent wines, truffles blacker than ebony that you could cut with a penknife. Boreatt ( firmly). No; my honor and courage are equal to the occasion. Lucy (who has entered during the last few mi- nutes, stops BOREALL). Stay, cousin; my husband has been making fun of you. . BoREALL, What!—and Agelina? Lucy. Is virtue personified. Boreatt. Is it true? I knew I had nothing to re- proach her with except her cooking. . But (pointing to the album) who is that man ? EpMunp. That? why that’s Coghlan. BorEALL, Coghlan of Wallack’s? Epmunp. ‘The same, BoreEatt. But why did you speak of him ? : Epaunp. _ You told Lucy that this lady was Miss St. Clair of the Union Square. Boreat, (aside). She’s told him. (A/oud) But what of that? Epmunp, That was my revenge. You threw a soubrette at my head. BoreEALL, And you pitched a leading man at my legs. Ah! what a weight you've taken off my mind. Jane (enters with the turkey on a dish). Here, ma’am, is the turkey. Can I go out now? Lucy. Wait a little. ' Borat. The turkey? (He looks interrogatively to- wards EDMUND, who turns his back; seeing that he is ignored, he says sadly:) No, Vl not partake of it; that shall be my punishment. (Zo the turkey, throwing it a kiss) Good-bye, Beautiful creature. (Zo the young people) Good- bye, my dear children.’ (He is about to go.) EpMunp. Cousin, haven’t you forgotten something ? Boreatt (looking about him). No, nothing. have my hat and cane. What is it, then? EpMunp. The turkey. comicbooks.com