Puck — March 1877 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUCK. = “PUCK", No. 13 North William Street, New York. FOR SALE BY ALL NEWS DEALERS. Terms To SunscripErs. One Copy one year, or 53 numbers, One Copy, six months, or 26 numbers. One Copy for thirteen weeks... Postace Fas Notics to Authora and Artists. Literary and artistic contributions are solicited. Address all manu- scripts and sketches to Editor Puck”, 13 North Willam St, New York. PUCK’S CARTOONS. PUCK’S FINGER-POST. Insurance Companies and Savings Banks are now negative terms. The first do mof insure you, * and the second only save you the trouble of spending your money by appropriating it themselves. Puck’warns the unwary. THE MILLENNIUM AT LAST. Puck has often wondered when the Millen- nium was coming, and still wonders; but should it put in an appearance unexpectedly, he has taken time by the forelock, and begs to submit his notion of Paradise. ‘Surely never lighted on this orb'a more delightful vison.” Isaian furnishes the text for our picture; but Pucx’s reckless artist has out-Isaiahed Isaiah, and has gone beyond the list of animals men- tioned by the prophe:; and although a Spitz- dog in Paradise, and a dove such as Cameron's Mrs. Oliver, may at first seem peculiar, they will be found indispensable to the happiness of the happiest of happy families. A TELEPHONIC SUGGESTION. Tue Telephone will be tested at Steinway Hall next Monday night. Of course Puck's enlightened readers will scarcely need any ex- pinstion of the word, although the ubiquitous umorist has spread himself on the ‘Telephone in the most liberal manner possible, and has given it the most varied of meanings and put it to the most miraculous of uses. Not wishing to encroach upon the grounds of the literary Telephonist, and yet teeming with a timely sug- gestion, Puck offers you his pictorial idea in connection with the sound-conveying, musi ally-telegraphic instruments, to be put in use nex Monday night. If we are to be denied the privilege of seeing the singers whose voices we hear from afar, we ought at least to have counterfeit -presentments of them before us. The only drawback—there must be a drawback to everything—is, that some wily speculators, may delude us by labeling a third-rate tenor voice with a picture of Wachtel; and who, but the most critical of us will be able to tell the difference, when the throat that warbles the note is so magy miles away? Tue delightful news reaches us that hereafter the Boston girl is going to pay her own fare, and not let her young man spend his five-cents in her behalf any longer. This is one step | towards helping the young man to economize; but the good effect of this reform dwindles considerably when we reflect that the same Boston girl took’a supper with her young man on the way home from the theatre, that night— and the young man paid for it. Ir drunken men are to be excluded. from street-cars, is there any objection to their using the elevated railway ? GONE! GREAT EXCITEMENT IN THE OFFICE OF “PUCK.” Mysterious Disappearance of the Ex-Devil. Is IT “HOOKEY?” OR ISN’T IT? Gloomy Opinions Gaining Ground. Was he Seen in Hoboken on Tuesday Night? IF NOT, WHY NOT? And Where is His Over-coat? R before in theannals of Printing-House Square has there been such an excitement. Puck's ex-printer’s devil, or, more properly speaking, printer's ex-devil, has suddenly dis- d. ast seen on the night of March 22d, buying a pint of peanuts, corner of Chatham and Pearl streets. He left the office as usual, but it was noticed bythe foreman that he was unusually melancholy, or, as the foreman expresses it, ‘‘ blue about the gills,” in the afternoon, and once or twice, while he was pulling a galley-proof, he was heard | to mutter “ Nixie Culley” and other mysterious phrases; and in the course of his labors he pied an interesting essay on doughnuts—a very un- usual thing for him to do! As soon as it became fully impressed upon Puck's staff that the “devil” had disappeared, reporters were sent to scour the city. And as the city needed scouring just about this time, the work went bravely on. In an interview with the peanut man the fol- lowing important facts were elicited: Several boys paid five cents for peanuts; the devil might have been one of them. ‘The peanut man would sell the same quantity for the same price to any one. ‘The peanut trade is picking up. ‘The peanut man voted for ‘Tilden. With these valuable clues the reporter im- mediately rushed up to the Albion Club in Fifteenth street, broke in upona billiard tourna- ment that was there going on, and rushing up to one of the members named Brisbayn, who had just succeeded, after a laborious effort, in getting himself straightened up to make ashot, clutched him by the arm and gasped: ‘Have you seen our devil?” This sudden outbreak so startled the pkleg- matic billiardist that he dropped his cue on the toes of Peakes, the actor, who made a few re- marks that can't be spelled, and then turned upon our reporter and exclaimed: “Go to the devil!” “That's where I want to go,” was the reply, “vehere is he?” By dint of much earnest persuasion, our re- porter then succeeded in inducing Mr. Peakes to allow himself to be interviewed. “Have you seen the boy?” was the first question, “Not to my knowledge,” was the reply. “Did you, to anybody else’s knowledge?” “Which boy do you mean?” “Don’t you know?” “No.” It then became evident to our reporter (who is a rather intelligent young man) that no further information could be gained from Mr. Peakes, and he immediately jotted down the above exciting fact and rushed over to the Lotus Club, where John Brougham was just in the act of discussing the Princess Royal, and said: “ Mr. Brougham,our printer's devil has dis- appeared; what is your theory regarding the matter?” Mr. Brougham immediately assumed a theo- retic look, and said: ‘elt is more than likely that the young man having had a part to study in a piece. for some amateur theatrical enter- tainment, and has quietly gone over to Hoboken to escape the annoyance of friends.” He was known to have bosom-friends,in Ho- boken, and to one of these, a blooming young lady of five summers, our reporter repaired. “T saw Joey a week ago last Wednesday,” said the girl. “He had on a light over-coat and ‘an umbrella.” She hadn't seen him since, but the umbrella was a new phase. Mr. Douglas Taylor, ex-Commissioner of Jurors, was next consulted; he said he never knew the boy, and didn’t remember ever hav- ing seen him in his life, but he thought it likely he had gone to Europe. Everybody went to Europe. 4 That notion wasn’t a bad one, but it didn’t account for the umbrella. Mr. Sheridan Shook was then interviewed. “Tf I were ever to tell all I know about that boy,” he said, you would be astonished. But Ishan't——” “What do you think of the theory that he has gone to Europe?” “Europe? Ridiculous. What did he want to go to Europe for? He could get all he wanted here, without going abroad for it.”” “Get what?” “Ah—that's just it, if I told you that, you might know it, but I shan’t tell it. But I will say one thing—he didn’t have an over- coat on.” “At what time?” “That's all I can tell you.” Just then John Morrissey walked up to him and they got talking politics, and the reporter was left ruminating. The Count Johannes was next waylaid, com- ing out of the Supreme Court: «Where can our devil be?” The Count ran his hand through his hair, and in a sepulchral voice replied: “Let the galled jade wince! our withers are unwrung.”” “Do you know him?” “Aye! chere's the rub.” “Ts that all you have to say on the subject?” “All? Nay, I could a tale unfold that would harrow up thy soul, freeze thy young blood, make thy two eyes like stars start from their spheres, thy knotted and combined locks to part, and each particular hair —” ‘The Count was still talking when our reporter left him—couldn’t wait for the climax. Commodore Tooker was found in his office at Booth’s Theatre, engaged in the hopeless task of trying to make sense out of the “Trip tothe Moon.” ‘The Kiralfys were bathing his head with ice-water, and Palladino and Mas- cagno, in full dress, were pirouetting at full speed to keep the atmosphere of the room in proper condition. “*You have heard that our devil is missing?” “Ah? indeed, that reminds me that John McCullough appears here next we: “Do you know the missing boy 2” “I know several devils; you are of course aware that Miss Neilson will close our season?” “When did he last visit your theatre ?” “Let me see. By the way, I ought to tell you that the Plymouth Rock will resume her regular trips to Rockaway, and my tailor has in course of construction two brand new naval uniforms—one undress, the other—” The reporter now thought that this mine was thoroughly exhausted, and after thanking the Commodore for his valuable information, withdrew, he es © © #© © # 8 @ »@