Life — July 19, 1928 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Driver oF Antiquatto Taxi: Taxi, sir? Henry: Er—yes. If you see one down the road, you might send it along. —Hoemorisr (Lonpon). Mrs. Demtosritenss: Here, Danny, run down to the store for a dime's worth of pebbles. Daddy's going to speak tonight. -IFORNIA PELICAN. SHAME! A neprtsentarive body of master plumbers called last week on a well-known American humorous weekly to. protest against the plumber-jokes which the latter constantly printed. It is maliciously rumored that one of the dele- gates had to go back for the protest, which had been forgotten.—London Daily Chronicle. WHAT ARE WE COMING TO? One more sartorial insult has been handed to the less deadly of the species. An advertisement for boys’ wear carries the line: “For Lads 6 to 12 Years Old—Flapper Pants."* —Detroit Free Press. A process-server has sued Gloria Swanson for twenty-five thousand dollars damages for slapping him. That is not the way to feel about the touch of a woman's hand.—New Yorker. TO START Occasionatty one finds a youth traveling an un- responsive path and by merest accident puts him right. As in the case of one young spring gradu- ate, who came to us yesterday for advice about entering the field of journalism. We're invariably conscientious about such things, so we unre- servedly advised him to get into the advertising cnd of the business, where the money is. Waxing enthusiastic, we said: “Why, one man in a New York company does nothing but sit in his office and dig up ideas! Think of it! He gets $30,000 a year for just sit- ting in his office!” “Well,” said the perfectly serious Young Hopeful, “I'd just as soon do that.” —Buffalo Courier-Express. “Horses Dislike Some Riders."—Sun headline, Sometimes we've had the feeling that horses dis- like some bettors.—New York World. “My sweetheart gave. me a rainbow kiss." “What kind of a kiss is that?” “The one that comes after the storm."" —Excetsion (Mexico City). INSPIRATIONAL STUFF “Dress well and succeed in a new shirt,” —Haberdasher's ed, Ir you're feelin’ all discouraged, And you're ready, ‘most, to quit, If you've lost the old ambition And your hopes have hit the grit, Never weaken, boy, I tell you, Don’t let on that you are hurt— R'ar right up, and face your troubles In an English Broadcloth, Exceptional Val ues, in All Sizes at $2.48 Shirt! Men have reached the top before you Who found trouble on their way, But their classy shirts upheld them In the thickest of the fray; You can pick the keen go-getter, Always eager and alert, By his square-cut jaws and shoulders And his Piccadilly Lounger, in madras and ox- ford, special week-end offering at $3.48 Shirt! Though the road is rough and rocky You must follow to success, You can make it, if you study How the snappy dressers dress. It is not the coat he’s wearing Makes the man, old saws assert— And they're right; the badge of greatness Is the Real Japanese silk, all fashionable shades, better buy a dozen at this price, Special $7.66 Shirt! —S. K., in Spokane Spokesman-Review. Nurse (to hospital visitor): 1 say, you musta’t come in here in that get-up. —Wrexty Terrcrapi (Loxooy). THE TRUTH AT LAST AN acouatntaxce of mine, an artist, who tt cently shaved off his beard, confided to me that his wife had left him. “It’s leave or be left these days,"* I consoled him, but, of course, I was polite enough to ak if the removal of his beard had anything to do with her take-off. "Yes," he replied; “when she saw me without my beard she said: ‘Now I know why I neve liked you!" "New York Evening World. VOTE FOR ROGERS! One of the most beautiful words in the bm guage, in presidential years at least, is this: Bunk. —Ohio State Journal. Cerrain investigating committees have discovered that big money doesn’t talk. —Arkansas Gazette. comicbooks.com |