Life — June 28, 1928 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Se a ae onner if Sel Sar? Ratatat Ke af se LIFE —— Play the SILVER KING “What’s the matter, Bill, earache?” “Earache nothing—a 90 degree slice came across two fairways and plugged me in the neck.” “That must have been Les Martin. Last week he took a mashie on the ninth and holed out ina vanilla sun- dae on the club house porch.” “Why don’t the members make him ive up golf or reform him? Make im play nothing but Silver Kings.” “I'd just as soon get a repaint in the neck as a Silver King. What's the difference?” “Psychological entirely. Evenwhen a dub plays this best of balls, it helps his game a lot. It gives him confidence to play the best ball made. He knows the King gets distance easily and he doesn’t press. It takes one great un- certainty out ofa very uncertain game. To play the Silver King is the greatest piece of golfing psychology I know.” Silver King — Reg. U.S. Pat, Off. [Imported by] JOHN WANAMAKER Wholesale Golf Distributors NEW YORK BOSTON PHILADELPHIA CHICACO MEMPHIS: LOS ANGELES ee) Mr. Ritchie’s Reply to Mr. Benchley of New York Tue British Post Office Telegraphs re- cently carried a cable from Mr. Ritchie, editor of the Seattle (Wash.) Star, to H. R. H. the Prince of Wales, asking the young saddle-bumper to explain, for his Far Western admirers, his frequent falls from his mounts. Answering this cable, Mr. Benchley says the Prince falls because of the law of gravitation. This explanation may go in New York—even in Canarsie—but it is received with low jeers in Seattle. The law-of-gravitation explanation was read, with appropriate ceremonies, to cowboys of the Bar-L ranch, who accompanied the Overland Mail into Seattle last week, and they near died laffin’. One of the mus- tangs fell over agin’ the hitching rail outside the post office and broke it, too. Is Lire going to pay for that? Or Mr. Benchley? Mr. Benchley says that the law of gravitation, as amended in the 56th, 57th, 58th and soth Congresses, et seq., forbids a body remaining in the air, except in transit. Yeah! How about Mohammed? How about Billy Sunday? Mr. Benchley speaks of the law of gravitation as a piece of ‘paternal legisla- tion.” Out here it applies to mothers, too—mothers, fathers and everybody. Males, females and Prohibitionists. (There are several of the latter still sur- viving in the hills, but alas! civilization has accounted for most of them.) According to the Benchley theory, as obscurely set forth in Lire, quite a com- plicated rigmarole has to be gone through before a rider, such as the Prince, may be brought to earth by gravitation after leaving his horse. Telegrams are ex- changed between Mother Nature (played by Groucho Marx) and Mother Earth (played by Estelle Winwood and two of the Singer Midgets). Finally, after the Western Union has advised them they mustn't use “hell” in their messages, the rider is allowed to fall. Well, that may be the procedure in Manhattan. Out here it is simpler: the horse just goes on; the rider drops; Mother Earth says: “Ooomp!” and _ the Elks Quartet sings “Nearer, My God, to Thee!” Simple, but affecting. Mr. Benchley refers to a mystery- man named “Sir Isaac Newton,” as the inventor of and lobbyist for the law of gravitation. Seattle has always understood this person to have invented fishing. However, this must not be taken as a criticism of Mr. Benchley, who is known out here as the great booster for “Abic’s Trish Rose.” For the Prince’s benefit a league to nul- lify the gravitation law is being organ- ized among Seattle cowboys; it is hoped Mr. Benchley will fall for it. A. J. Ritchie. (Editor of the Seattle Star.) first ai bh SMOKERS Dip it ever strike you that your smoking taste might need alittle first aid? A little health ful help? Surely, sometimes, that taste gives you warning that it does. Just a bit of prevention adds such a lot to smoking en- joyment—just the daily use of Squibb’s Dental Cream. It fights destructive acids, keeps the delicate tissues healthy, and leaves your mouth pleas- antly soothed. The minute, clinging particles of the Milk of Magnesia it contains, keep your breath sweet and react to prevent your smoking taste from growing sullen and ewes —s disgruntled. The next time you buy your favorite smoke, buy a first aid kit of Squibb’s. That “ounce of prevention” will put a new delight in smoking. Guard The Danger Line © 1928 by E.R. Squitd & Sons comicbooks.com