Life — June 14, 1928 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

—_ eer t The Movie Usher Referees a Football Game “Witt you kindly remove your foot from the quarterback’s neck, sir? We are instructed to accommodate all the play- ers as far as possible, sir. “Pass down the field at the left, please; the head linesman will show you your downs. Don’t crowd around the half- back; there are enough balls for every- one. “Please remain in your places while the visiting team plunges for ten yards. No, sir, we had not been informed the left guard was a dirty skunk, sir. He has had very good notices in the newspapers. “Sir, I shall be forced to ask you to give up your place in the line unless you refrain from biting the left end’s ear. There have been complaints from other players. “No, sir, there will be no scores in this period. Kindly step back from the goal line, please. Watch your step! The scoring begins promptly at 3 o'clock.” EXTRA HOURS Nicurr Watcuman (to employer): I ‘ot to have overtime for last night's work, boss. I overslept and didn’t leave the job till 9:30. THE POLITICAL FRONT Extraterritorial Tuere are fifty-three separate pieces of ground in Washing- ton on which the Eighteenth Amend- ment is null and void. There are fifty-three men who may purchase and consume as much liquor as __ pleases them. Deliveries are made for themselves, their families and their office help, without even academic hindrance from the Government of the United States. These unfortunate per- sons, I regret to say, are miserable for- eigners, who have never known what it is to live under the Declaration of Inde- pendence. Accredited near the Government of the United States are fifty-three Embassies “I'm sorry, Bill, but if you can’t get rid of them freckles, I'll have to give you notice.” and Legations. Each of these is foreign soil. What seems a white-stone residence is a little bit of Ireland. An ostensible red- brick dwelling is a corner of Siam. Step through an iron grille on R Street and you are in Sweden, or if you walk on the grass in another place you are as good as in Naples, This is what is known as } extraterritoriality, It is a racket that has even the Anti-Saloon League defeated. eee Eacu diplomatic establishment in Wash- ington sends to the Department of State at regular intervals a list of its require- ments in wines, beers, liqueurs and spirits. This list includes beverages for official entertaining, as well as for the private use of each Ambas- sador or Minister and his staff. There is theoretically no limit, other than an indefinable but ob- vious limit of dis- -| cretion. No Embassy | wishes to become known to the De- partment of State as an excessive con- sumer. The Latin Embassies run somewhat higher than the Anglo-Saxon, owing to their preference for wine rather than for more compact hard liquor. The Department of State, on receiving these lists, transmits them to the Treas- ury, which is charged with the enforce- ment of Prohibition. In due time the con- signment arrives from abroad, usually aboard ship at Baltimore. The Treasury thereupon issues the requisite permits, and the liquor is brought to Washington in a guarded motor-truck. It is delivered at the purchasing Embassy or Legation, and divided according to the individual orders of each member. Thus the Eight- eenth Amendment remains inviolate, for wherever you drink this wine, it is foreign. There is no doubt about that. eee Tue creat Embassies in Washington are very scrupulous in enforcing the rule that these importations are for the per- sonal use of accredited diplomatists. Per- comicbooks.com