Life, 1928-05-24 · page 23 of 38
Life — May 24, 1928 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes early 20th-century American economic anxiety and social pretension. **"Will It Come to This?"** (top): A working man named John Smith—employed fifteen years at the "Blooey Baby Carriage Company" earning thirty dollars weekly, with only $46.78 in savings and a home requiring 234 more payments—is asked by a well-dressed man how much he wants to pay down on *chewing gum*. The joke: despite financial precarity, consumer culture demands payment for everything, even trivial items. **"The Art of Admiring Newlyweds' Apartments"**: Satirizes social performance and class anxiety among young couples. The "Willenvogels" (German name, suggesting working-class immigrants) are easily pleased with flattery about their modest home. The "Fossetts" (implied educated, readers of *American Mercury* and *Vanity Fair*) require sophisticated dishonesty—one must pretend *not* to like their apartment to gain their approval. The satire targets both the pretentious intellectuals and the exhausting social rituals required to navigate different classes. **"Home Training"**: A street urchin asks an old gentleman to light his cigarette; when refused, the boy explains his mother forbids him playing with matches—absurd logic exposed as teaching through reverse psychology.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
~ will It Come to This? “Wnar’s your name?” “John Smith.” “Where do you work, Mr. Smith?” “['m with the Blooey Baby Carriage Company.” “Been there very long?” “About fifteen years.” “What's your salary now?” “Thirty a week.” “Own your own home?” “Only 234 more payments.” “Whure do ou pak, Mr. Smith?” “At the Eighteenth National.” “How much have you got there?” “Lemme see—$46.78 the first of this month.” “Family?” “Yeah. Wife and three kids.” “Well, I guess that'll be all. Now, Mr. Smith, how much do you want to pay down on this package of chewing gum? Chet Johnson. The Art of Admiring Newly- weds’ Apartments Tue art of admiring newlyweds’ ape ments is far from simple. It requires a high degree of talent and in some cases genius; it calls for skilful mimicry in which dic- tion and pantomime are subtly blended, courage, a keen ear, a flair for ventrilo- Ovp Gentieman: Light setts; limitations of space will not per- mit anything more elaborate than that. quism, some knowledge of French, and These Fossetts call forth one’s highest a nice sense of balance, coupled with powers in the art of admiring newlyweds’ some ability at acrobatic dancing, espe- apartments because they want the Truth. dally in those apartments where the rugs} — are small, the floors highly polished, and the wife named Bobbie. A box of as- pirins will often come in handy, too. Sometimes, of course, the art of admir- ing newlyweds’ apartments need not be complex or even much of an art. This is tue where the newlyweds are named Willenvogel. You tell the Willenvogels in aloud, clear voice that everything 1s fine, nice, gorgeous, exquisite, comfy, etc. Then you sit down with them in the kitchen and tell them that the home brew is fine, nice, gorgeous, exquisite, comfy, etc. The Willenvogels are the easiest audience in the world to please. Now and then they may become critical, but the fault in nine cases out of ten is not with your perform- ane but with the hops. Just one word of caution: Do not let Mrs. Willenvogel sit on your lap, It is where the newlyweds are college graduates and subscribers to the Ameri- can Mercury or Vanity Fair that the would-be admirer of newlyweds’ apart- ments needs to be an artist, with all the endowments listed in the first paragraph. We shall call these newlyweds the Fos- Humane Inventions Disguises for diffident ostriches, burying in the sand, and eliminating wear and tear. ving head- Home Tratninc Smart Boy: Will ya light me cigarette for me, mister? your cigarette for you? Smatt Boy: Yes, me mudder don't allow me to play wid matches. Nothing you may say in disapproval will hurt their feelings. They take nothing seriously, you understand. They are Civ- ilized. They have a Sense of Humor. This litle apartment of theirs is a place—they are apt to refer to it as “the place” or “the dump”—which has been furnished to please only themselves. Be courageous with the Fossetts. Tell them, or rather, as artfully as possible, give them to un- derstand, that you do not like their apart- ment. You don’t appreciate their things at all; they are a little too unusual, a trifle too unconventional for you. You, you must convince them, are a Babbitt. In other words, the art of tickling the Fossetts pink is the art of not understand- ing them. Be an artist; remember, any fool can understand the Fossetts..... Besides the Willenvogels and the Fos- setts, there are many other types of new- lyweds in apartments that people are called upon to admire from time to time. It would be a good idea if they all moved to Greenly Island. Tupper Greenwald. First Orr Macnate: I tell you, the Constitution has got to be safeguarded at all events. Srconp O1t Macnate: Yes, look where we'd be if it weren’t for trial by jury. comicbooks.com