Life — February 16, 1928 — page 35: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Glossary of Popular Song Terms OPULAR SONG: Any superbly idiotic collection of words, pref- erably without the germ of an idea, gathered, borrowed or invented by a popular song writer and set to Popular Music: A tune uprooted from classical music and trans- planted into an accompaniment con- sisting of a pandemonium of dis- cordant notes, shrieks, screams, whistles, ete., by an alleged Composer: Any _ boilermaker, blacksmith or steel riveter who can find a word to rhyme with Baby: Feminine, any female who is not a baby, preferably one who is unmarried or married to somebody else, synonymous with Mamma: Any woman who is not a mamma; that is, not in your own immediate family, a term usually preceded by the word Hot: Having a high temperature, ring in a febrile condition, feverish, in rare instances brain-feverish, the rare instances being when there is a brain present, this organ not being ‘y when the subject is in : The tender sentiment which keeps popular-song writers’ parents from shooting them when they show signs of breaking into the Song-Writing Game: Mailing your verses around the country to all the publishers till they get worn out and you decide to Publish It Yourself: Pay for the printing and then carry all the copics around in the bottom of your trunk for the rest of your days, un- less you happen to have an uncle who is a Song Publisher: The fellow who makes all the money in the song business anyhow, and what every song writer is going to be as soon as he makes one Big Song Hit: Any popular song that lasts over ten days. Asia Kagowan. «AIRY Story—There has been discovered a detour sign that looks like the work of an expert sign-painter. Cream of Beoteb Homespuns, direet from makers sult- leneths by post, $2.00 per yd. Samples free oo statiog ‘shades desired. ALL, 277 Stornoway, Scotiard. FOR g MEN OF BRAINS (O07 IGARS -MADE AT KEY WEST— Romantic places you’ve always wanted to see Go now on the Malolo N EMERALD set in the blue Pacific...an island paradise — Hawaii. Four days beyond the Golden Gate its pleasures are waiting for you; its fascinations are eager to claim you. Think of swimming off Waikiki in the moonlight; think of golf on a famous mid-Pacific course—think of strangely deli- cious new foods to eat, new sights to see,new sports to enjoy! Why not gonow? Glamorous Hawaii is now but four short days from the mainland. Even from New York it is but three weeks’ round-trip. The splendid new MALOLO, swiftest and most luxurious passenger vessel ever built in the United States, sails from San Francisco every other Satur- day. She makes the passage in the amazing time of only four days. Let this year mark the happy event of your Hawaiian holiday. There are one or more Matson sailings from San Fran- cisco every week. Regular sailings from Seattle, too. All-expense inde- pendent tours of Hawaii from $275. AUSTRALIA and the,South Seas ONLY 19 DAYS VIA HONOLULU Sailings from San Francisco every third Thursday Matson liners offer— FASTEST TIME, FREQUENT SAILINGS, COMMODIOUS QUARTERS, SPECIAL ENTERTAINMENT, ALL DAY AT HONOLULU. Features of the Malolo jodations for 600 frit class passengers. Seven decks for passengers’ . Elevators serve all decks, Motion picture theatre. Ballroom, completely equipped gymnasium, children's playroom and buge Pompeian swimming Wolo phone at the bead of every bed. 130 private bathrooms. More deck space for its size than any ship afloat. Excellent meals. Dining room seats all passengers at one time., Matson line Hawaii - South Seas: Australia For informat bout Matson tours inquire at our mearest office or at amy travel agency ‘Write Matson Navigation Company, Dept. 29-B at any of the following addresses: 215 Marker St., San Francisco-$35 Fifth Ave., New York—140 So, Dearborn St., Chicago —$10 W. Sixth Se, Los Angeles~ 1319 Fourth Ave., Seattle. comicbooks.com