Life — October 13, 1927 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“My Best Friend Told Me” “NIJEVIL, old Basil gently, laying his hand on my shoulder, “there is something you should know.” “What is it, old man?” hopefully, for Basil is my friend. He took a couple of turns up and down the and then a trifle a ly picked up a choice bit of cloisonné and hurled it to the floor. man,” said I asked best Persian rv “Dash it, old man!” he exclaimed. “I can't tell you. I simply can't! All week I've been trying to make up my mind to it, but T can't. You must find it out for yourself.” “Oh, tell me, old man,” I urged. He swallowed desperately. “It's this, Nevil, old man,” he said. “Do you know why you are so dashed unpopular? Do you realize why nobody cver comes to see you?” I bowed my head in my hands. So it had come. Even Basil, who scarcely ever notices anything, had noticed that people were avoiding me. For at one time I had been pop- ular, I had possessed many friends, I had been smiled upon by fortune. Now I was shunned as is a leper, and, oh, how T felt the shame and disgrace of it! Yet I had never un- od, on!” I pleaded desperately, g the worst. t's this,” said Basil. avoid you because your you have no—because—" off. take this card. “People because He broke “Oh, dash it, old man! Here, Write to this busi- “HOW MUCH ARE YOUR RIDING LESSONS CosTING You?” “ABOUT TEN DOLLARS A THROW,” ness firm, one of the greatest in the country, doing a business of millions of dollars a day. Ask them to send you a bottle — no, perhaps you'll need a dozen. Then, old man, you will know ihy people have given you the raspberr I took his advice, and I have never regretted the money spent. For now that people know that I always have a case of gin on hand my house is full, beautiful women lavish their affections on me, and my friends call upon me morning, noon and night. Especially Basil. Tip Bliss. Prejudiced AUNT MARY: i T he preacher is coming to call this afternoon. Dora just read Sinclair Lewis): Do think it’s safe? (who has you LAPPERS — Exercises in Self-Control Five Fascinating Ways of Develop- ing Your Will Power 1 EMBARK on transatlantic liner. * During first day out eat mush- room soup, fried cabbage, land boiled dinner, tripe cherry pic, strawberry shortcake and New Eng- and onions, d stand in Cuban cigar. peach ice cream. Go ¢ bow, smoking 2. Take lovely sophisticated lady for ride. Park car. Place about her waist. Recite Gettysburg — Address, clearly. ght arm Lincoln's enunciating 3. Drive too near policeman in heavy traffic. Pat his stern with mud-guard. Resist impulse to say, “Tag, you're it!” $. Settle yourself comfortably to wait for the dentist Read the Mentor, June, 1921, Puck, April 1, 1904, and the Christmas, 1896, Lit Digest. Listen to scraper at work on next building Hear long howl from Room. Keep your seat. erary stone Dissecting 5. Refrain from paying your in- I MY, BUT TIME FLIES, DOESN'T IT? P2 YES, AND YOU JUST SIT STILL, Four out of five come tax. have tt. H. F, comicbooks.com