Life — June 9, 1927 — page 32: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ilestones in National Service An Advertisement of the American Telephone and Telegraph Company Tuere are twenty-five Bell companies butonly one Bell System—and one Bell aim and ideal, stated by President Walter S. Gifford as: “A telephone service for this nation, so far as humanly possible free from imperfections, errors or delays, and enabling anyone any- where at any time to pickupa telephone and talk to anyone else anywhere else in this country, clearly, quickly and at a reason- able cost.”” The year 1926 brought the service of the Bell Telephone System measurably nearer that goal. Seven hundred and eighty- one thousand telephones were added to the System—bringing the total number interconnected in and with the Bell to more than seventeen and a half million. A} The number of applica- oO tions waiting for service, including those in new and outlying sections, was reduced fifty per cent. A third transcontinental tele- hone line was completed to the Pacific coast. The largest number of miles of toll wire for one year was added to the System—more than 664,000 miles, The average length of time for completing toll calls throughout the System was lowered by thirty- five seconds. A seven per cent improvement over the previous year was made in the quality of voice transmis- sion in toll calls. An adjustment was made in long distance rates amounting to areduction of about $3,000,000 annually, ROYAL BLUE LINE Sight-Seeing Motor Tours Mlustrated Maps and Guides outlining the above service at all tourist agents or mailed free. Royal Blue Line. Boston, Mass. Insist on the best service in America Too Humble Tue cottage at Easthampton, Long Island, where “Home, Sweet Home” was written is to be demolished. Regret is felt that it was not situated on this side of the Atlantic, so that some American might have been tempted to acquire it for re-erection in his own country. —Punch, Revived Two Negro women were discussing the new pastor. “I likes him,” said one, “because he asks de Lord for things de other preacher didn’t know He had.” —Pittsburgh Sun. As One Fan to Another ELL, old timer, I see we are going to have another yacht race for the America Cup next sum- mer and that solves the problem of my vacation right off. I am going to the mountains. You know, old timer, that I was assigned by a diabolical newspaper editor to cover the last of those races, when Shamrock out-anchored Reso- lute. My Irish parents always told me that shamrock wouldn’t grow on foreign soil. With foreign water, it must be different, for the one im- pression I got of Shamrock was that it was taking root right there of Sandy Hook. For all I know, it may have sprouted one of the rare four-leafed variety by this time. There’s only one job I can imagine worse than reporting the next America Cup race and that will be taking the slow-motion pictures of the event. It will be all right for the press photographers, because the yachts pose beautifully for the stills, You'd think they were divorcces, they’re so perfect at it. But I don't know how the poor movie man is go- ing to make them move. If you ask me, the junior varsity crew of Passaic High School, for in- stance, could spot both yachts fifteen minutes’ start and pass them in the first sixteen minutes of the race. It isn’t really a race: it’s an endurance contest, and my endurance isn't what it used to be. The United States Navy kindly put two destroyers at the disposal of the press during the last race, old timer, and I'll say this for our Na it may not be ready for war, but perfectly clegant as a social institu- tion. The destroyers just loll around, and I remember vividly, in this con- nection, that the New Jersey coast has about the swellest ground swell ever to gray a complexion on a bright day in August. The officers’ quarters are excel- lently appointed. They have the nicest bunks it has ever been my misfortune to hear about a yacht race from. But they should make the portholes bigger. After a while a man has trouble pushing his empty quart bottles through them; and along about nightfall he has to cut his empties down to pints. I recall, too, that during the last races there was some talk of the com- mittee’s requesting spectators to throw only paper cups overboard, owing to the danger existing in the possibility that the frail yachts might run into one of the empty quart bottles and founder. Nothing, old timer, ever could in- duce me to watch a yacht race again, unless it might happen to be an as So xo a fe gea & eo GZssee agre comicbooks.com