Life, 1925-11-12 · page 34 of 41
Life — November 12, 1925 — page 34: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct pieces of content: **"Safeguarding the Lanes of Speech"** is a Bell System advertisement celebrating the completed New York-Chicago telephone cable ($25 million, references President Taft's inauguration). The phrase "lanes of speech" metaphorically describes telephone transmission capacity. It emphasizes reliability during weather and superior service—framed as essential infrastructure. **"Grade-Crossing Dream"** is a satirical cartoon depicting an irate motorist cursing at trains at railroad crossings, complaining that trains ignore warning signals. This mocks the motorist's delusional belief that trains should stop for cars—when clearly the opposite is true. The joke exposes the motorist's absurd entitlement and ignorance of rail safety hierarchy. **"We Are Dining with the New-Voes This Evening"** humorously catalogs an extravagant dinner party with excessive food, drinks (champagne mentioned repeatedly), music, and dancing—sarcastically called "a very simple affair." The humor lies in the contrast between understated language and ostentatious excess, likely mocking wealthy social pretension.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Safeguarding the lanes of speech The New York-Chicago telephone cable has been completed and is now in service. A triumph of American telephone engineer- ing, the new cable is the result of years of research and cost $25,000,000 to construct. Its first reach extended along the Atlantic seaboard, then steadily westward until this last long section to Chicago was put into service. To the public, this cable means dependable service irrespective of weather conditions. It is now not likely that sleet storms, which at times interfere with the open wire type of construction with 40 to 50 wires on a pole, will again cut off the rest of the nation from New York or from the nation’s capital as did the heavy sleet storm on the day of President Taft's inauguration. The new cable means speedier service, as it provides numerous additional telephone circuits and will carry a multitude of telephone and telegraph messages. It would take ten lines of poles, each heavily loaded with wires, to carry the circuits contained in this most modern artery of speech. This cable, important as it is, is only one of the Bell System projects that make up its national program for better telephone service to the subscriber. It is another illustration of the System's intention to provide the public with speedier and even more dependable service. frame Q AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES BELL SYSTEM. One Policy, One System, Universal Service GRADE-CROSSING DREAM Irate Motorist: DARN THOSE FOOL TRAINS! THEY THINK THEY OWN THE CROSSINGS AND WON’T NOTICE A WARNING TO STOP. AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY We Are Dining with the New- Voes This Evening We are dining with the New-Voes this evening. Of course, it’s a very simple affair. They have asked just a few others, About ninety, we understand. First, they are going to serve a round of cocktails. Then, several other rounds, And still a few more after these. There will be caviar Malossal. And countless hors d’ceuvres, And supréme of grapefruit, Maras- chino. And tons of crab meat. And Petite Marmite 4 I’Ancienne. And broiled lobster. And mallard duck. And noisette of milk-fed veal. And every conceivable vegetable. And alligator pear salad. And bombe glacée. And fruit. And coffee. Of course, there will be oceans of champagne, And sherry. And claret. And Burgundy. And Rhine wine. And sauterne. And whisky and soda. And every known liqueur. And, after dinner, still more oceans of champagne. Then, they are going to have a little music. They. have engaged three jazz bands and about thirty professional perform crs. They may dance till dawn. After that we're not sure what they have arranged. The dinner is to be at half-past cight. Of course, it’s a very simple affair. Cc. G. S. “One good burn deserves another,” remarked the clothing merchant after a fire sale, as he sprayed his stock with gasoline. Next WEEK THE FOOTBALL NUMBER with a cover by John Held, and a representative display of collegiate wit by Robert Benchley, Baird Leon- ard, H. W. Hanemann, Percy Cros- by, Corey Ford, R. E. Sherwood and many others. This is the biggest event of the Football Season. DON’T MISS IT! Reservations may be made at the nearest news-stand. Admission, as usual, only fifteen cents. comicbooks.com