Life — September 3, 1925 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE - 13 —— STARTIN THE 18° OF LAST MonTH= CN: 2 Rev Diary Lay late, reading in the publick prints, dwelling specially on the departments devoted to the care 27th of the body, and why I, who am one of the healthiest women extant, should waste my time on such rubbish I know not, yet I do find fascination in reading strange women in the Bronx who have had such and symptoms, ete. Did up the magazines, too, and coming an article by Rupert Hughes about pet economics their folly, I did call in my servant Florence and demand that she straightway cast out all the empty pasteboard boxes which she could find on the premises, my penchant for re- t them against a need which never arises having de- prived me of much space which could be better employed. My other phobia in this connection is a waiting taxicab, whether or not I am paying for it, for if a guest do but tell that he hath a cab below, I am at some pains to make conversation with him....To tea at the Biltmore with rgie Richardson of Chicago and her father Mr. Samuel er, Who is just back from Europe, and never did I see such an assortment of desirable and luxurious finery as he brought back by way of presents to his friends, and he did give me a gold atomizer for my pocket-book which delights me extremely. He showed me, too, a picture of Jacob's Well, which he had visited in Palestine, and when | laughed at his having mixed highballs with some of its water, he gave me some of the latter in a small scaled ue....Ted Aiken with us for dinner, and during the I did shudder two or three times, causing him to that somebody was walking over my grave. Her frequeney at that recently, quoth Sam, convinces me that she is going to be buried in Times Square. August alk All the morning gone in the shops since I could ugusi ¢ eee. . August lay getting some of the necessities of life no 28th Wife: WHAT IN HEAVEN'S NAME ARE YOU DOING IN THAT SUIT OF MINE? Husband: THAT CROWDED BARBER SHOP, WELL, I WANT A HAIRCUT AND THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I'LL GET IT, IN “GOIN' T’ TH’ BOOSTERS’ MEETIN’ T’NIGHT, JAPHEZ?” “NOPE, AIN'T GOIN’. DON'T BLIFVE IN IT, THIS TOWN OWES. ME ENOUGH Now, 'THOUT IT GITTIN’ NO BIGGER!” Stern's to sce about my sables that my speech became twisted and 1 did ask the lift’ boy, What floor flurs? whereto he responded, Flifth, And Samuel, when I told him, did state that a youth of such conversational readiness would do better for himself and others in a law office than onan elevator, and I do believe he means to look him up and employ him, and if he do, I daresay I shall now and then have something amusing to put in my journal, For aught we know, this may be a turning point in that lad's life, and how surprised he will be in after years to ponder how it came about through a tired woman's lapsus lingua, but when I did say as much to Sam, he quoth, Lord! I do but put this boy on our gate, and you future him amongst sunken gardens and safety vaults. Why waste such material on me when the Saturday Evening Post will pay you money for it?...Dined this night with the Bannings, and then fell to cards, a curious thing happening during the play in that a rank mistake on Edith’s part actually did keep us from going rubber. As Janie Duff used to say, it’s very trying when your opponents’ stupid playing turns out to their advantage. Baird Leonard. comicbooks.com