Life — June 11, 1925 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“DEAREST, 1 THINK WE SHALL HAVE TO LET THE NURSE Go.” “WHY? SHE SEEMS VERY EFFICIENT.” “YES, BUT I'M SO AFRAID THAT SOME DAY SHE'LL pROP BABY.” LIFE - Die-Hard—1972 Model S he swung from Broadway into 42d Street, the night crowds parted, fell back swiftly and silently. From the mob surging at his heels came a staccato fire of jeers and cat-calls, drowned at intervals in a threatening, sibilant “Sh-h!" A’ small boy, perched on the iron railing of the subway entrance, knocked off his straw hat with a dextrous fillip; it fell to the ground and a writhing tangle of sou- venir hunters clawed it to shreds. But he, deaf alike to admiration and scorn, marched on in proud isolation, head high, shoulders squared, straight to the lobby of the theatre. As he neared it a sudden respecttul hush settled over the curious. ager necks craned—fect shuffled restlessly— when, after a moment's hesitation, he turned boldly into the lobby. There a large sign confronted him. The silence grew strained. He gazed at the sign calmly, as if uncertain that he read aright. “Final Performance.” Leisurely he removed his eyeglass, wiped it with a pocket-kerchief, read again: “Final Performance A grim smile—a smile of satisfaction not un- mixed with relief—testified that the message was clear. With obvious pleasure he read it a third time: Performances Then, contemptuously, he spat upon it and turned away. A deep-throated howl of approval rocked the narrow street. Klaxons bells clanged deliriously. Eager hands lifted him shoulder-high while the mob, in a frenzy of joy, wrecked the lobby of the theatre. “Who is that man—the Governor?” shouted the buyer from Milwaukee to his friend. “That,” exclaimed the garment sales- man solemnly, removing his hat, “that is the man who has never seen ‘Abie's Irish Rose.’ It closed to-night.” L. C. Beutel. brayed ; Boasting MArce: Dolly claims to be won- derfully quick at figures Maryorig: I should say she was! That girl can remember dates she never had. ROBABLY the complete garden, with all Burbank improvements, will be equipped with the turnless worm. Overdoing It OCTOR: Exercise is what you need, my man; what do you work at? Patient: I'm a bricklayer. Doctor: Lay an extra brick every day. RADIOPERA GLASSES, MAGNIFYING Not ONLY THE ACTION ON THE STAGE, BUT ALSO THE MUSIC AND DIALOGUE The Heart Beneath the Ermine (In a newspaper article entitled “About Men,” Queen Marie of Roumania describes her ideal man as follows: “I want to ride through I want the great wastes with him. to share his tent, his fire, his food. I want to lean’ my head on his shoulder and hear his strong, faithful heart beat....But J hav cver met my man of great wastes —my pioncer.”) got those restless blues, I've got an awful yen For the great open spaces Where men are men, I've got those restless blues And I want to go To God's own country Where the biceps grow. T want to can my crown, I want to quit my throne— And join Tom Meighan in the Great Alone. I want to find a MAN who'll be good to me.” These were the Marie. words of Queen eee Said the King (her husband) in ac- cents low “I never should've took her to that picture show.” R. E. Sherwood. comicbooks.com