Life — February 5, 1925 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

There is the tale of the duffer who took six swipes at his ball on the first tee and then remarked to his opponent: “LM bet you thought I was trying to Wit it.” “Well, ponent. “Alas,” moaned the duffer, as he bent to his task again. “You were right.” American Golfer. yes, I did,” admitted his op- What the Young Man Will Wear Tue Cutter: How in the world did you manage to sell that suit which turned out to be such a terrible misfit? Tue Crerk: A young chap thought it was “collegiate.” . —Youngstoen Telegram. Varlet: sv The Sardonic Interviewer What a sense of humor that chap must have had who first conceived the idea of asking a successful man: “To what do you attribute your success?” —New York Morning Telegraph. Erickam on a OUR VILLAGE THEATRICALS Lor, My Lord: wwerrrore, VARLET? Varlet : ou, Lor’, 1’'vE FORGOTTEN ! —Passing Show (London). politician—A pygmy with feet of clay.—Cyrano (Paris). The Pioneer For ten years the old cripple had stood on the street-corner, grinding out dis. cordant music on his wheezy hand-organ and gathering indulgent coppers from the passers-by. Then one day building materials were unloaded across the street, and work was started on a many-storied fashionable hotel. The work continued for over a year Finally the last window was polished, the last bit of gilt paint dried, and an im posing liveried doorman took up his sta tion in front. “Here!” said the doorman to the organ-grinder. “You can't set up with your hand-organ in front of our hotel! “What do you mean, you old monkey ? came the indignant answer. “Ain't | let you set up your hotel in front of my organ?"—Lustige Blatter (Berlin). In Washington “What's the excitement in the Con gressional Library?” “Seems a Congressman wandered in.’ —Louisville Courier-Journal. SPARE ME! Simite—As unimportant as a new scratch on a four-year-old car. —Ohio State Journal. Lire_is published every Thursday. simultaneously in the United States. Great Britain, Canada and British Possessions. Title registered in U. S. Patent Office. $5.00 a year in advance. tional postage to foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.60 a year; to Canada, 80 cents. Back numbers cannot be supplied. 4 illustrations in apply to £ in Live ave copyrighted. For Reprint Rights Lire, Rolls House, Breams Buildings, Fetter Breams, Bui The foreign trade supplied from Lire’s London. Office, Rolls House. ings, London, E, C. Canadian distributor, ‘The American News Company, Ltd., 386-388 St. James Street, Montreal, Canada. addressed envelope. No contributions will be returned unless accompanied by stamped ond Live does not hold itself responsible for the loss or non-return of unsolicited contributions. to Notice of change of address should reach this office two weeks prior the date of issue to be affected. Madison Avenue at 47% Street NEW YORK ichigan at Jackson CHICAGO + WH you first use a PENNSYL- VANIA Quality Lawn Mower you are delighted with its ease of operation and its clean-cut work. As the years pass by you marvel at its freedom from repairs and the fact that it does not need sharpening. Self-sharpening, tool steel knife and blades and other exclusive features ensure unrivaled efficiency and a durability that makes it the most economical mower in the long run. You can identify any PENNSYL- VANIA ality Lawn Mower by the new STAYTITE Handle—“The Mark of a Good Mower”—and the letters “P. Q.” cast in the sides. At Hardware and Seed Stores Send for booklet “How to Have a Fine Lawn” PENNSYLVANIA LAWN MOWER WORKS 1625 North 23rd Street, Philedelphie ENNSYIVANIA Quality LAWN MOWERS comicbooks.com