Life — October 16, 1924 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Eve (revisiting her birthplace THE WAY, WHAT EVER BECAME OF THE GARDEN OF EDEN? The Serpent: tne Fable for Militarists NCE upon a time the World Series ad been finished, so the president of the Stove League called in his asso- ciates to what could be done about stopping war. It was decided that world peace could readily be obtained by ex- tending the benefits of the rain-check system. And so the League got the nations of the world to agree to fight all battles within battle parks, with spectators in grandstands and all that sort of thing, but never to battle dur- ing rain. Then the governments’ ex- perts got busy and found a way to produce rain every time any battle was about to start. H. H.R. Tests for Antiques ITH so many spurious imitations on the market, a few simple tests to determine the genuine article might not be amiss. For instance: Old Colonial mahogany highboy. Try to open second drawer from the top. If highboy fails to respond by falling on top of you, don't buy it. If it does, you won't have any need of it. Ale tankard of Shakespeare, Dis- racli, or Dickens. Take it. on trial. Fill with Scotch and oscillate contents in small circles. If tankard leaves handle and crashes to floor it was as represented, SOUVENIk COLLECTORS DISCOVERED IT, “Pre-War Stuff, Bonded.” From all that we hear, every factory making it closed down at noon on August 10, 1914. Hence, you can't go wrong in this line. At any rate, not more than once. Louis NIV cheval glass, ten feet. Stand off Wave your arms and move head rapidly from side to If glass reflects anything save Cardiff on a foggy night it is not genuine. Pewter candlesticks of Ben Franklin, Would advise aj as historians now agree that the Founder of Thrift Week had He both retired and arose by the light of his roommate's candle. Stanley Jones. inst purchase of these, none, “HOW long did you stay at the dance last night, Lucille?” “Oh, not long. Four cocktails and a pack- age of cigarettes.” wonder vi vhether the lady Governor of Texas will have a_ kitchen cabinet. Judge: Hobo: WELL, MY MAN, I WASN'T DRIVE: WHOLE TWELVE MILES MYSELF. The Seven Ages of Collecting HEN I was an infant, very littl And given to squalls, Then I suspect I began to collect Dolls. temperamental Later on I took to crawling Over the intricate patterns of rugs; Many a mile I crept to pile Bugs. Winters passed; I was somewhat book- ish, Poring nights under flickering lamps This the desire that set me afire, Stamps. I covered my college den with phote Of aunts, of uncles, myself in curls But I must aver that most of them wer Girls’. Aiter the A. B., bread and butter; After the campus came the strife; Sweet in my lap sat a handicap, Wife. Then long I worked for the wife and kiddies Long I labored to make ends join; The debit amount and the bank account Coin! So at last I've come to six and sixty, My mind with minor memories rife Such stuff I'll cook to a 2-vol. book “Life.” W. LL. Werner. WHO DROVE YOU TO DRINK? YOUR HONOR; I ROWED THE comicbooks.com