Life — November 22, 1923 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

+ LIFE - Arye Milano Fifth /henueskvorite/joe something fine about it $350andup = Ww DEMUTH. at the better femoke shops Philosophy of a Plain Man I’m just a simple, natural man And, like my dad before me, I live as plainly as I can; A faster life would bore me. ‘Twas good enough for him; I choose To make his creed my own. And so, not having one, I use My neighbor’s telephone. I loathe the trend of modern thought, And ev'ry new invention That impious vandal hands wrought Just fills me with dissension ! New-fangled foibles pass me by— I scorn them all: and so, Whene’er I feel the need, I try My neighbor's radio. have The comforts Dad enjoyed were few, And yet, I’ll stand or fall By them—why bother with the new? My neighbor has ’em all! L.A. M. Tue future is what fools call to-mor- row; and what wise men call to-day. Su ire Relief ry Al SELL-ANS FOR INDIGESTION 25¢ AND 75¢ PACKAGES EVERYWHERE The Trail Blazers THE man who had invented the best rat trap ever made, after’ long years of unceasing experiments, sat back in his hut deep in the woods and waited for the world to beat a path to his door. He did not have to wait overlong. True to the prophecy of the sage, the world came. At least, part of it did, in this order: Star salesman of the Cheese Co. Advertising manager of the Rat Trap Gasette—“Devoted to the Best Inter- ests of the Profession.” Delegation from the Society for the Preservation of Rodents. Game warden who wished to know whether that trap was really intended for rats. Sob sister from the Daily Blurb— accompanied by photographer. Income tax collector. Platoon of life insurance agents. Committee from a nearby Chamber of Commerce delegated to inform the in- ventor tactfully, but firmly, that his activities were bringing unfavorable publicity to a strictly high-class resi- dential community which had always prided itself on being’ absolutely free from both mice and rats. Aggressive JLK.M. All-American Officials Ir All-American football players, why not All-American football officials? Rather than ask any more questions without answering them, let us plunge at once into our subject, which is “All-American Football Officials.” We therefore present herewith the only of- ficial list, you might say, for 1923, to- gether with the reasons for the in- dividual inclusions therein: Umpire: Moe Ginsberg; because of his brilliant open-field and cross-coun- try running during, and after, the game between St. Ignatius College and Xavier Academy, at which he officiated. Referee: John Bellicose; perhaps the best of that staunch band of officials who can, and so often do, stop any team’s forward passes with their faces. Bellicose showed during the past sea- son that he is especially to be depended on when the pass is made at a critical moment. Field Judge: Peter (“Tom”) Turtle; an official of refreshing radical tenden- cies. Once came on the field ready to start without first comparing his watch with those of all the other officials. Also, never wears white flannels in games, Linesman: Paul Holstein; once no- ticed a member of the home team play- ing offside, and reported him. Also, apparently has a fair idea of actual length of ten yards, measured in terms of yards. A.C. M.A. new cigarette? If you are wholly and perfectly satisfied with the cigarette that you are now smoking, and the container provided for it, we wouldn’t want to assume the re- sponsibility of inducing you to change. But, on the other hand, if you feel that your present brand falls short in one way or another; or if you are an- noyed by a crude and clumsy package, we venture to suggest that the Reeds- dale Cigarette, in its new and improved container, may come a little nearer to your ideals. eo 0° The pleasure one might get in smok- ing cigarettes is halved by a misfit brand; or, to put it another way, the satisfaction that one gets from smoking a not-quite-right-for-me brand may be doubled by changing to a brand that comes closer to one’s personal taste. So the reasons for trying a new cig- | arette, in the case of Reedsdale, at least, are: the possibility of finding a cigarette that will give you a greater pleasure from cigarette smoking; and the probability that the new Reedsdale package will be a convenience to you, as a cigarette smoker, that will further add to your satisfaction. oe Reedsdale Cigarettes are made of fine tobaccos, blended with expertness; and the Reedsdale blend, as it stands, was found to suit, better than any other, a decided majority of the large number of cigarette smokers comprising our trial jury. The new Reedsdale package is an im- proved container that is unquestionably an advance in pocket containers, from the standpoint of convenience and of keeping the cigarettes in prime condi- tion—fresh, full-flavored, uncrushed and unbroken. Popularly priced Reedsdale Cigarettes are 20c for a pockese of twenty. They are now sold yy many tobacco dealers and their dis- tribution is being rapidly extended. If you have any difficulty in finding them we will send you a carton of 5 packages of Reedsdale Cigarettes (100 cigarettes) postpaid for a dollar. Smoke one package at our risk. If you don’t like them, return the four remaining ackages and we will refund your dol- lar. Address Reed Tobacco Co., 103 South 21st St., Richmond, Va. To Retail Tobacco Merchants: If your jobber cannot supply you with Reedsdale Cigarettes, Reed Tobacco Company, Richmond, Va., will gladly send you prepaid by parcel post a carton containing one hundred or two hundred Reeds- dale Cigarettes for the same price you would pay the jobber. comicbooks.com