Life, 1923-10-04 · page 14 of 44
Life — October 4, 1923 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
The page contains two separate satirical pieces: **"Chicago's Version"** mocks a University of Chicago professor's modernized translation of the Gospels into contemporary slang. The poem ridicules replacing King James Bible language with "jazz" and street vernacular ("crook" for "traitor"), arguing this degrades Scripture's timeless eloquence. The author (Edward S. Van Zile) sarcastically suggests that updating biblical language to match fashion trends betrays the text's spiritual and literary value. **"Defined"** is a brief comic sketch about when someone becomes a true "executive"—the punchline being "when he takes up golf," suggesting golf-playing represents the leisure and status markers of business success. Both pieces reflect 1920s anxieties about modernization, cultural change, and loss of traditional values.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Romantic Lover: AREN'T THE STARS BEAUTIFUL TO-NIGHT, DEAR? “YES, INDEED! WHAT A LOVELY NECKLACE THEY’D MAKE.” Defined “At just what point do you begin to call a business man an executive?” “When he takes up golf.” Chicago’s Version (A professor at the Chicago University has just completed a version of the Gospels in so-called modern English.) ELL us “the old, old story,” but not as our Bible has! Ho for Chicago’s version changing King Jamie to jazz! What though our classic English is searching and strong and sweet, We ought to put slang in the Gospels to get to “the mar in the street.” Modern you must be or perish, be you a man or a book Our fathers dubbed Judas “‘a traitor,” to-day we would call him “a crook.” The point that they’re making is simple who are wording the Bible anew— If the Scriptures keep up to the fashions they'll talk like Spoon River to you! They'll lose the fine flavor of ages, the wonderful wording of old, Like counterfeit paper that’s passing where once all the money was gold. And we who rebel are old fogies! hearing to us . Who turn from the gold of the Gospels to Chicago’s base metal—to cuss? Why should they give Edward S. Van Zile. Visitor: EIGHTY-FIVE IS CERTAINLY A RIPE OLD AGE, MR. GRIMES. Grimes: THAT’S NOTHING; IF MY FATHER WAS ALIVE HE'D BE A HUNDRED AND TWENTY, “REALLY! HOW CAME A MAN OF SUCH VITALITY TO DIE?” comicbooks.com