Life, 1923-08-02 · page 24 of 40
Life — August 2, 1923 — page 24: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine satirizes the musical comedy industry through a dialogue between Miller (a songwriter) and Blaatz (likely a producer or director). The cartoon and accompanying script mock the formulaic, cynical process of creating Broadway entertainment. The humor centers on how creative professionals manufacture "snappy lines" for shows—not through genuine artistry but through recycled gags and crude jokes. The example they debate is a crude joke about alcohol content causing splinters in fingers, which they treat as comedic gold despite its obvious awfulness. The satire targets the industry's cynicism: Blaatz dismisses better song ideas as "pretty old," and both men treat a terrible joke as a "guaranteed, No. 1, sure-fire knockout" simply because Bernard Shaw couldn't do better. The implication is that Broadway musical comedy relies on lowest-common-denominator humor rather than actual wit or originality. The lighter items ("Hottest-Day Thoughts") are trivial timefillers typical of the era's magazine content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
MILLER (sorrowfully): Naw! Then that won't do. (Thinks—honest- ly he does.) Lemme see. He staggers offstage. Why can’t we get the orches- tra to play that old thing the kids hum for a lame man? You know. (Hums.) Rum-ti-tum. Rum-ti-tum, Rum-ti-tum-ti-ti-tum-ti-tum. Then she could sort of sing, “Haig-an’- Haig. Haig-an’-Haig. Haig-an’-Haig- an’-Haig-an’-Haig.” BLaatz (aggressively): We don't want a parade or a song and dance. A line we want; a good, snappy line. Miter (dubiously): Might use, “He's got that twelve-quart look.” Biaatz (definitely): We might, but we won't. Miter = (triumphantly—afte a long pause): Y got it. I got it. She says, “There’s so much wood in al- r / / i -Y/, cohol these days that you get splin- Just our Yi y) ; 7, ters in your fingers when you pour Z out a drink.” How's that? We Biaatz (enthusiastically): That’ oo igs (enthusiastically) That's eae { AWS (i YU WN\y, it, kid. I couldn't do no better my- ay >, g self. Bernard Shaw couldn't do no SEPTEMBER! ii 5 NW) gL better than that. It’s a guaranteed, A eee Saat hes as No. 1, sure-fire knockout. Ts ¢ = Muer (reverently repeating): VYAMES MONTGOMERY FLACE There's so much wood in alcohol these days that you get splinters in your fingers pouring out a drink My friend Mrs. Spuyten Van Bile Braatz (admiringly): That's a Yanked her teeth out when gums were the style. bear of a line. They’ll steal that for The style changed, you bet, the Follies sure. A bear of a line. So she ordered a set — (Curtain.) Till they came, the poor dear couldn't smile! J. K..McGuinnes FOOLISH STYLE—WASN'T IT? . . Europe Humor in the Making ITHOUT the gate, A Drama of the Musical Comedy Industry I stand and wait, Book by J. Miller; Lyrics by Milton Blaats; Score by Innings. Like the beggar of old, BEAATZ (enialty) : Right here, could say, “Follow the green line, Shivering, cold... . now, we should have-a good kid.” But that’s pretty old. Still, There is a difference, though, snappy line. Something the boss there’s always a laugh in the subway. And one might place it so: should be sure to pull on his stenog- How about, “There goes the Subway He wanted crumbs from the rich rapher the next morning. Son”? man’s board, Miter (brightly): Well, lemme Biaatz (more firmly than ever): T wait for the love of man you hoard see. The juvenile has just finished Naw! For yourself. FM his comedy number. What's it again? Miter (brightly): Maybe she Biaatz (proudly): “The Man in could do some Scotch stuff and say, Hottest-Day Thoughts the Moon Is a Moonshine Man.” A “Hootch, mon! Hootch!” HAT is the distance to the sure riot, that number. Biaatz (sadly): Harry Lauder’s North Pole? Mutter (unimpressed): Then he — sure to pull that one. Where is the nearest ice plant? staggers offstage, don’t he? Mier (regretfully): I guess When did the Big Blizzard occur? Biaatz (indifferently) : Yeh! maybe he will. Here’s something Is it difficult to learn how to ski? MILter (uncertainly): Well, then, might do: “One drop of bootleg What is the fare to Greenland? how about having the prima donna makes the whole world kin.” Who invented the sleigh? say, “He’s got the speak-easy stag- Biaatz (scornfully): That don't Isn't freezing a pleasant death? gers”? mean nothing. When was “Snowbound” written? Braatz (firmly): Naw! Mitter (amazed): Don’t you get Who first thought of summer furs? Miter (a bit downcast): Naw! it? What are the proper ingredients That’s not so good. (Muses.) She Biaatz (more amazed): Get what? of a Mint Julep? comicbooks.com