Life, 1923-06-21 · page 21 of 36
Life — June 21, 1923 — page 21: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes early 20th-century American institutional corruption, referencing muckraker Upton Sinclair's exposés of corporate malfeasance. **"Unmasked"** mocks university commencement ceremonies as tools of wealthy industrialists. The text names **Rockefeller** and **Morgan**—robber barons who allegedly controlled institutions—searching graduates for "contraband ideas." Students are "handcuffed and blindfolded," marching down "Wall Street." Faculty sing hymns reworded as "Old Hundred Per Cent." The satire suggests universities serve corporate interests, not education: honorary degrees go to millionaires and corporation lawyers, not scholars. **"John Drew, Litt. D."** humorously laments that actor John Drew receiving an honorary doctorate will "settle down" and stop his witty late-night socializing—an ironic poem doubting a title changes character. **The cartoon strip** depicts wealthy men encountering street children: references to elite "Skull and Bones" societies and exclusive club rituals highlight class division, with the final panel sardonically showing a poor boy's actual concern—repaying borrowed money.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE Unmasked (4 Commencement Program Based on the Very Latest Discoveries of Upton Sinclair.) C \NDIDATES for degrees, after their credentials have received the visé of the legal representative of Mr. Rockefeller, will be searched by employees of Mr. Morgan for contraband ideas. They will then be hand- cuffed and blindfolded and will march to the place of the exercises, the band playing “Up the Street (Wall).” The president and corporation having renewed their oath of fealty to Judge Gary, the assemblage will sing the Doxology, to the tune of “Old Hundred Per Cent.,” accompanied by the house organ. The scripture lesson will be from a major profit. \ standardized commencement address will be broad- casted from the publicity department of the National City Bank. It will later be printed in the subsidized press. Honorary degrees will be conferred upon millionaires, corporation lawyers and representatives of the effete aris- tocracies of Europe. Members of the faculty will form lockstep and march to their summer concentration camp. Diplomas will be presented by a representative of the National Cash Register Company. Private detectives will disperse the crowd. Next! A GENIAL optimist over in London (Eng.) is offering prizes for the inventions of the future which will st benefit the human race. We offer the following tions to those embryonic Edisons who may wish something on which to exercise their talents: Turkish tobacco cigarettes, containing turkish tobacco. Non-skid bath mats. \Vash-bowl stoppers that won't get out of order. \utomatic theatre curtains that will rise at 8:15. inflammable coal. Feature films that are not “super,” and cost less than $1,000,000. \ baseball manager not confident of the pennant. Edible artichokes. Reliable football game forecasts, SK. hr. John Drew, Litt. D. John Drew went to Dartmouth, and donned WHEN a gown and hood, We grumbled: “Now he’s ‘Doctor’ he'll settle down for good! No more the midnight hour to him a gala time shall be, He'll have to go to bed at ten now he's a staid Litt. D. “He'll have to curb his flashing wit and Greek and Latin quote,— Where will he find Falernian to wet his scholar’s throat ?— He'll be, as he has always been, a glory to our town, But where's the tailor skilled enough to cut his hood and gown? “The bays are fresh upon his brow, a nation cheers him on, But we must call him ‘Doctor’ who used to call him ‘John’ ; And proud though we may be of him, we'll mourn the old days when John Drew was not a Litt. D, (Hon.)—and sat up after ten!” ‘ Edward S. Van Zile. Tes Gang HAVEN’T BEEN TAPPED YET.” “WELL, I AND SAVEN BE PRAISED—AT LAST! I WONDER WHICH ONE IT Is. BONES? ROLL AND CHEESE? poG’s HEAD?” “SAY, PERC, I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL OVER FOR YOU—HOW ABOUT THAT TWENTY BUCKS YOU BORROWED LAST MONTH ?” SKIN comicbooks.com